


The Baseborn Princess and the Aesir Prince

by wolfpawn



Category: Thor - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Battle, Brides, Cruel Comments, Falling In Love, Gen, Guilt, Sister - Freeform, Tumblr: imagine-loki, backhandedness, illegitimate child, kind
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-29
Updated: 2017-12-12
Packaged: 2019-02-08 12:44:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 24,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12864774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wolfpawn/pseuds/wolfpawn
Summary: Imagine you’re a bastard daughter of a king of a far-off realm, the product of his drunken loneliness at battle. His guilt of cheating on his wife drove him to send you to live on Midgard, but due to the fact that his other children (and his wife) adore you, you’re often invited to visit.The time comes for Thor and Loki to find their brides and they come to your home realm to invite your sister, who is only a couple months younger than you, to come to the castle with other princesses from other realms to help them decide. One of the younger of your siblings blurts out and asks if you are coming as well. Odin finds out from a very guilty sounding king that you are his bastard daughter, and Frigga invites you as well, much to your dismay.You know almost nothing about the court life, and living in the palace is difficult. However, you seem to be the only woman there that doesn’t repulse Loki with constant attention, and the two of you spend hours in the library talking about the two different worlds you come from. Soon he is falling in love, and when the time comes for the princes to choose their brides, he immediately chooses you and confesses his undying love to you.





	1. Chapter 1

The war had been tedious and long fought, but in the end, the Light Elves were victorious. Asgard was battling with the Jotnar, that battle taking place on both Midgard and Jotunheim, but on defeating Laufey and his armies, Odin set his sights on Alfheim’s woes and assisted them in their struggle. King Sika took no time getting back to his family after two years away. Within a month, his wife was with child and he was more than happy to put the war behind him. 

But the war was not the issue as far as the King was concerned. Within a few months of his return, there was a scandal in his palace. A newborn baby was brought to him, a girl. Her mother had died in her birth and when the healers went in search of her father, they realised that her markings were those of royal lineage. When she was brought to the king and he enquired after her mother, it was revealed that in the time that he was in the war, one of the healers that had tended to the wounded warmed his bed on a cold and less than honourable night. He had been racked by the guilt of it before for his actions, but now there was living proof of it, he felt all the worst. Lydia, his wife was distraught that he had not told her, but she understood that war made good people do odd things, and the little girl was only a few months older than her own little girl growing within her. She felt a love for the child, motherless and in need of tending to, but Sika felt nothing but guilt and insisted she be raised away from the court, in the forests near the palace. 

It is there she was raised, having her mother’s passion for helping others. She went to the palace on occasion, Lydia insisting she needed to know she was not completely alone and that she had siblings, but Sika remained aloof, still feeling sick with himself for his actions, though his wife forgave them. That is how Clodagh came to know how she came to be, she felt guilty that she had caused hurt between her father and his wife, a woman that never showed her anything but love and kindness, she also knew that behind it all, her own brothers and sister should hate her, but they never did. Her brothers, all older seemed to just accept her existence and felt as protective of her as they did their other sister, and her sister, Amelia adored her. 

She visited the palace on occasion and was given a good education and living accommodation and never asked for anything. People knew of her, but as she was so quiet and out of the way, no one tended to make much mention of her. 

When Frigga came to Alfheim in search of potential partners for her sons, her first point of call was the Alfheim palace for Amelia. There were a few high born women in Alfheim that were of enough sanding for the Aesir princes, so Frigga ensured they were all invited to Asgard to be allowed their chance to be courted by them. 

‘What about Clodagh?’ Amelia asked innocently as she spoke with the Allmother on her arrival. Frigga frowned and questioned the young woman on who was this “Clodagh”. ‘My sister.’ again, Frigga was left perplexed, having known Lydia to have only ever birthed a single daughter and three sons. It was then the young princess told the Aesir queen of her illegitimate sister. 

Frigga went to Lydia and Sika about her. Lydia smiled, seeing the confusion on Frigga’s face when she broached the matter with her. ‘She is a result of the trying nature of war, Sika...he does not like to dwell on it, but his actions in camp was the reason for her being.’

‘Lydia, you never…’

‘What good would come of it all, Frigga? My children would be from a broken home or poor little Clodagh would have been left with nothing. When they brought her to the palace, she was so scared, so alone.’ Lydia explained. ‘I could not let her think she was not worthy of love.’ 

‘Where can I find her?’

‘She lives in the forests. I will have a carriage readied for you.’

Frigga was unsure what she would find when she went to the forests but what she was expecting and what she got were entirely different things. 

She was met by a young woman of notable beauty, not in her external features alone, but her nature. When she came to the dwelling, the first thing she noted was the pleasant sound of laughter that was soon followed by a woman calling after something. 

‘You are a terrible tease Jemima.’ the voice declared. ‘What good is a duck meant for eggs when she hides them all. Honestly Betty, what will we do with her?’ there was no response. Frigga walked around the side of the dwelling and watched as a fox sat on a stool watching a girl with dark hair and skin that was somewhat darker than the Alfheim royal family’s yet she seemed so alike to them that it was clear that she was Sika’s other daughter. ‘Rua, I need that stool, how else can I get this done.’ She scoffed, playfully shooing the fox. It was then she noticed the woman in front of her, ‘Oh, hello, can I help you?’

‘I am looking for a young woman by the name of Clodagh.’

‘That’s me.’ 

‘May I speak with you for a moment?’ She nodded. ‘You don’t know who I am, do you?’

‘I think I do, but I am hoping you’re not her because if you are, I should probably have bowed by now.’ Clodagh seemed to be almost wincing. 

‘Yes, I am Frigga, Queen of Asgard.’ Frigga smiled. 

‘Hi, sorry.’ 

‘You are quite alright, Dear, in fact, I can honestly say this is the loveliest meeting I have had in a considerable time.’

‘Wow, you must meet some horrible pigs.’ There was an indignant grunt from behind them. ‘Not you, Pua.’ She turned to the Allmother again. ‘Sorry, he is too smart for his own good.’

Frigga could only chuckle. ‘It’s fine. Do you keep these animals for any reason?’

‘They all got abandoned, I felt sorry for them.’ She explained. 

‘Is that how you feel?’ Frigga asked, that caused her to look at the foreign queen. ‘Lydia told me about you, everything about you.’ Clodagh looked at her hands. ‘You feel ashamed, why?’

‘Look what I am.’ 

‘A young woman with a caring heart?’

‘A bastard, a...I am the reason that many people talk, I am the result of….’

‘Do you really call yourself such a name?’ Frigga looked at her in shock. 

‘It is the meaning of it, isn’t it, I am that.’ She stated sadly. 

Frigga looked at the kind-hearted young woman in front of her, who, even with people trying to show her love, had thought herself unworthy. ‘Do you know what I am here?’ Clodagh shook her head. ‘My sons, Thor and Loki are to have the royal women of the realms join us at the palace to see if any of them are suited to my sons.’

‘So why are you here?’

‘You are one of them.’ 

‘I’m not…I can’t...I’m a...’

‘Do not say that word in front of me. I do not want to hear such a word. You are so much more than you think you are.’ Frigga stated firmly. ‘By blood, you are royal and as such, you are asked to attend.’ 

‘I am not royal though, my father may be, but I am not.’

‘Your blood is royal, that is the prerequisite, we leave tomorrow at six am. Do you need a wake-up call?’

‘I like to get up with the sun and make the most of my day.’ She smiled. 

‘What time is the sun up?’

‘Five.’

‘Then I will have someone here for you not long after.’

‘Is it wise to force young women to meet the princes of the realm without them being readied?’

‘I do not like lying to my sons, if these girls are so annoyed by meeting them like this, I rather they know about it in advance.’ Frigga winked. 

‘Why are you telling me this?’

‘Because you do not use makeup, do you?’ Clodagh shook her head. ‘Do you know how?’

‘Amelia tried to show me once, but I am a lost cause.’

Frigga gave her a small smile but said no more on it, her thoughts flitting around her head at her meeting the young woman. ‘I will see you tomorrow.’

‘What about my animals?’

‘They will be tended to in your absence.’ Frigga promised. ‘But bring one if it is a domestic pet if you like.’

‘Rua is the closest to domestic, he’s better than the cat anyway.’ 

Rua is….’ Frigga looked around and was met by a grinning fox. ‘I have never seen one alive so close, they are lovely creatures.’ Rua began to pose, causing the Allmother to laugh. ‘Norns you are an incredible creature.’

‘I’ll be fine without them, I will be back soon enough.’ 

‘I am going back to the palace now, do you wish to come with me and save you some travel in the morning?’

‘No thank you, I must ready things here.’

Frigga looked sadly at the girl but said no more, taking her leave and going back to the Light Elf palace. 

‘You seemed troubled, Allmother.’ Lydia looked at her friend.

‘I met with Clodagh today.’ The Allmother admitted. ‘By blood, she is included in this little roundup.’ 

‘And?’ 

‘She is not what I expected.’

‘Her mother was a Healer, I am told.’

‘That I would believe.’ Frigga nodded. ‘She sees herself as lowly.’

‘I think so, yes.’ 

‘Her mother?’

‘Died birthing her, she never told anyone who her father was, it was only after the doctor noticed her birthmarks...’ 

‘Sika was implicated.’ Frigga answered. 

‘It is hardly an implication when it is the truth, she carries his mark, she has the one closest his out of all the children and she is the image of his mother.’

‘How do you not hate her?’

‘How can I, she never asked to exist, Frigga, she is the innocent party in this.’ 

‘And you?’

‘I was a grown woman then, I am no fool, wars make people do things they regret. He wanted to tell me from the moment he came back, but how do you say such things? He fears to show her love is to somehow insult me. He watches her from afar, wanting to, but he cannot, even when he sees me and our children do it. It tortures him.’

‘He is not the party I pity.’ Frigga growled. ‘But this is not my marriage, I can have my opinions, it does not make them valid in this situation.’

‘She is not trained as a princess.’

‘No, but those things can be learned should they be required.’


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clodagh goes to Asgard and finds that this is not a pleasant group of people hse is being forced to deal with.

Clodagh already hated the women she was surrounded by, they were so scathing and toxic, she wanted nothing to do with them, she was relieved when finally she got to Amelia and the half-sisters stayed together. 

Asgard was like nothing they had ever seen, big, gold and bold were the best words for it in Clodagh’s opinion. She looked around the city as their carriages made their way into it. She watched as a little girl who dropped her toy without noticing as they passed, immediately she had the carriage stopped so that she could get out. ‘Here you go.’ She smiled, giving the girl back her toy. ‘I had one of these when I was your age too, they are so much fun.’ 

‘Yes, she sings.’

‘Well, my one didn’t do that, I am so jealous.’ She smiled. 

The girl beamed at her. ‘Are you a princess?’

‘Sort of.’

‘Are you going to marry Prince Thor or Prince Loki?’

‘I don’t know.’ 

‘I think you should.’

‘Well, thank you.’ She smiled. ‘What is your name?’

‘Mia.’ 

‘Mia is such a beautiful name. I wish my name was that pretty.’

‘What’s yours?’

‘Clodagh.’ 

‘That’s….different,’ Clodagh erupted in laughter, as did most anyone listening to them. 

‘It is very different. It is the name of a river in Alfheim.’

‘Why are you named after a river?’

‘I don’t know.’

‘Did your daddy lose a bet, my daddy did once and that is why he had to do something silly.’

‘I am so sorry.’ The girl’s mother pulled her back. ‘Please excuse her lack of manners.’

‘Please, she is a child, she is alright.’ Clodagh smiled. ‘And regarding her words, children are so pure and honest, it is so lovely to see one so at ease with herself, she is a credit to you.’ The woman stared in shock at her kind words. ‘Mia, I hope you have a lovely day and take care of your toy.’

‘I will, bye Princess.’ 

Clodagh did not correct the child, instead, she just smiled and waved. Amelia smiled at her sister, knowing her love for children, often offering to hold her nephews or nieces for her brothers when she visited. The other women in the carriage, however, gave dirty looks at her for delaying them. Finally, the carriage made its way to the palace again. 

Frigga, who was in a carriage to the front of the convoy looked in interest at the scene she had just witnessed, smiling as she continued to the palace. When she got there she waited for all the carriages of women to arrive. The last of which, holding Clodagh and Amelia as well as two others, was over three minutes delayed, leaving the other women to whisper among themselves and make comments about the odd girl stopping the carriage. 

Finally, the carriage arrived and the two women that were there with Amelia and Clodagh seemed almost distraught at the delay. ‘Now, you will all be settled into a guest corridor, there you will all have to share quarters with another girl, and you will be expected to have your staff liaise with staff of the palace here, so do not hesitate to ask for anything, but remember that this palace is not like any you were reared in, it is also the centre of business for Asgard and many other realms. 

At being told that they were having to share quarters, the most of the girls baulked, wanting to tantrum and strop, but they knew the Allmother was watching. As soon as she said it, Amelia and Clodagh looked at one another and nodded, the sisters standing beside one another, there was no one else Clodagh could consider. There were other sisters present, but they seemed to be willing to slit one another’s throats in order to get ahead, Amelia was not interested in being in competition with her sister, and Clodagh did not think herself as being part of the group in general, she thought herself there to make up the numbers, a formality, she would not think herself to have a chance. 

They made their way through the palace to their rooms, Amelia and Clodagh speaking in one another's confidence as they did. They were left to settle and prepare for the evening. 

‘It’s all so much bigger here.’ Amelia commented. ‘If you find they are not agreeable, what will you do?’

‘Go home as soon as I am allowed. I should not be here to begin with.’ Clodagh responded. ‘I am not like you.’

‘You better not be lobbing me in with that lot.’ Amelia stated indignantly. 

‘No, you’re nothing like them, but I am not like any of you.’ Clodagh explained, toying with her fingers. 

‘Clods, seriously, you are of better bloodlines than most people here, you need to stop this self-deprivation of yours, you are royal by blood, and you look exactly like Grandmother, it is scary. I often wonder what your mother looked like to say you are so identical to Lily.’ 

Clodagh looked at her sadly. ‘I have no idea, I don’t know anything about her.’

‘Nothing?’ Clodagh shook her head. Amelia pulled her close. 

‘Lydia has been so kind to me, you all have, but I know nothing of the woman I should call mother.’ Clodagh looked around. ‘I have no idea what I am doing here ‘Meils.’

‘Okay, I am going to help you learn some things that will help, don’t worry.’

*

‘I thought you said there was twenty-seven, I counted twenty-eight young women.’ Odin commented as his wife joined him on the balcony of their rooms that overlooked the city. 

‘Yes, twenty-eight.’

‘Where did we accumulate the extra one, Midgard? Can you believe the number of Royal families that place has?’

‘Alfheim.’ Odin frowned and looked at his wife. ‘Did you know that Sika has an illegitimate daughter?’ 

‘I heard rumours there was one more than Lydia gave him, but details I was not sure, no one seems to know particulars.’

‘He sired her during the Elven War, she was born to the camp Healer, she is in the Late Queen Lily’s image and by far the kindest creature I have ever lay eyes on.’

‘Is she the one to stop the carriage?’

‘That was her.’ Frigga nodded. 

‘What are they like?’

‘Every sort, scheming, intelligent, dense, boring, dull, bright, attentive, everything really.’ 

‘Any potentials?’

‘About five possibles between them both.’ 

‘We just need two.’ Odin commented. 

‘Do you know what Sika’s daughter refers to herself as?’

‘Well, you have said she is kind, so I doubt it is some form of delusions of grandeur.’ Frigga did not respond. ‘What does she call herself?’

‘That word.’

‘Which?’ Odin demanded before his wife’s face told him. ‘You cannot be serious?’

‘She calls herself it, and feels she deserves to be called it.’ Frigga stated sadly. 

‘Frigga, do not get attached, there are so many girls, you cannot…’

‘If she is not suited to either of our boys, I am asking her to stay as my Lady in waiting.’ Frigga stated. 

‘Of course you are.’ Odin growled, knowing better than to argue. 

*

The wing the girls were being kept in was large and though there were extra rooms, they were told to remain only their own. Already people were stating they were going to break the request, or had done so immediately and took a room to themselves. Amelia and Clodagh just watched in shock at such audacity. 

‘She could be testing us.’ Amelia stated to Clodagh as they left their rooms for dinner.

‘Could, she is, wait and see, there will be issues with this.’ Clodagh stated. ‘You don’t just go into someone else’s house and decide yourself what you are doing.’ 

‘A true princess would never accept such demands and the Allmother knows it,’ One princess that overheard them declared. ‘A princess has to take command of the situation, show that she is able to do what she needs to.’ 

‘We are here five minutes, we have no right.’ Clodagh stated. 

‘That is the difference between a Vanir and an Elf, we are confident.’ The girl scoffed before walking off. 

‘That and her father is also her mother’s brother.’ Amelia whispered into Clodagh’s ear. 

‘Do not stoop to their level.’ Clodagh warned, ‘You’re better than them.’ 

They spoke to a few of the other girls, trying to ascertain who was someone they would actually talk to and who would be best to avoid. The princess Clodagh found herself speaking to the most was a Niflheim one, Regina, she was intelligent and completely disinterested with the whole situation. She had no interest in the Aesir royals, they were “too soft” for her liking. She was very much interested in Helblindi, the son of Laufey of Jotunheim, but she wanted to use the opportunity to reach out to the Aesir princes, help broker trade and friendship with Asgard, meaning she was not interested in the politics of bratty women trying to one-up others either, and in turn, it made her a good conversational partner for the Elven sisters.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki hides from the glut of princesses that have invaded his home by going into the gardens on a rainy day but there he overhears a small conversation and becomes curious about a woman he sees before she runs off, will he meet her again and who is she?

Thor and Loki were somewhat startled by the sheer number of young women that were being thrust upon them. They also realised very quickly the motives of some. Loki used his ability to see through liars and gave his brother the most subtle of head movements to indicate who was there only to better themselves. That weeded out many immediately, though they were not allowed to say anything yet, the brothers were adamant, either a good match or none, something even their parents agreed with. 

Speaking with the women could be tedious, some were incredible vapid and self-centred, though if Loki was to be believed, so too was Thor, even he had to concede that though Thor could, on occasion be self-centred, two women in particular even put him to shame. 

They had their usual tasks and training that were expected of them but they were also expected to spend time with different girls, getting to know them somewhat. It made it difficult to get a few moments to themselves. On one occasion, when it was raining, Loki felt it was easier to seek refuge in the palace gardens than hide from the numerous women that had infested the palace at his mother’s request. He sat under a tree watching the fish come to the surface of the pond, thinking the drops of water were food. It was incredibly peaceful with no one else out there, even the gardeners had rushed for cover in the change of weather. He sat there for a time, taking in the sounds of the quiet garden, the water hitting different leaves and water and the now shallow formed puddles. It soothed him greatly, exactly what he needed after the hustle bustle of inside the palace. 

He noticed something caught his attention, a sweet sound, somewhere in the gardens. He listened intently and moved towards it, the falling water wetting him as he came out from under his refuge. 

‘What are you doing here you silly boy, you could get hurt, look at that fall, you could have a terrible broken leg, that will not do at all, we’ll have to take a look at it.’ he stood behind a pillar and looked around. There, drenched in mud and kneeling in a puddle of water was a woman, he did not recall seeing her in the glut of women that introduced themselves to him, but she was definitely not Aesir, her features were incredibly Light Elf in appearance, her skin, though naturally darker than most Light Elves, was clearly darkened more by exposure to the sun. He circled her quietly as she continued to focus on something in the bushes. ‘See, now you have tangled your leg. Come here and let me see it, these strings are to keep the bushes in line, they are not for little hogs to be getting themselves caught up on.’ There were little grunts and squeaks following her comments. ‘Oh, you poor little thing.’ She cooed, ‘That leg is terribly sore. Come on, I have just the remedy for that in my room, we’ll have you scurrying around looking for grubs again in no time, okay?’ She rose to her feet, her dress clearly ruined, her hair stuck to her face and rushed inside, using what she could to keep the creature covered. Curious, Loki followed her but was startled to see she eluded him quickly. 

He found himself wondering about the Light Elf, and what was in her hands. She mentioned a hog, but what qualified as a hog? He found her niggling her way into his thoughts. He looked at the girls that he was forced to endure in search of her. There was one Light Elf princess, she seemed reasonably nice, but she was not what he would look for, nor did she seem too interested in him. But she was not the kind-hearted creature that had tried to assist some manner of animal. He looked for her in the staff also, but again, she was nowhere to be found. He began to get irked by it all as he sat in the library one afternoon. 

‘Excuse me?’

‘Yes, Dear?’

‘Have you anything on the care of Hedgehogs?’

Loki frowned as he listened to what the girl was requesting, having never heard such a peculiar request for a book in his life. 

‘Yes, animals are towards the back on the right, if you hit the war books you’ve gone too far.’ The librarian stated. 

‘Thank you so kindly. I am sorry for the inconvenience.’ Loki froze, he knew that voice, she often replayed in his mind in quiet times. He rose from his seat and followed the voice, sure enough, he found himself looking at the same girl again, or he thought so anyway, again her back was to him and her hair was dry this time, but it seemed to be her. She scanned the shelves as high as she could see before stepping back to see higher ones. She did not pay attention to where she was going, and Loki in his curiosity did not step back, leading to her crashing into him, his quick reflexes being the only reason neither hit the floor. With his hand behind her back, he found himself looking into eyes that reminded him of the richest chocolate, they were bright and beautiful, as was the face of the woman that possessed them, in his opinion anyway. ‘I am so sorry.’ She began to apologise immediately. 

‘It’s quite alright.’ Loki smiled, taking in her features. She was a full Light Elf, her ears and markings clear. He had learned the royal Light Elf markings when he was younger, it meant if he ever met a high ranking Elf, he would not embarrass himself, hers were that of King Sika, which startled him, she was one of the princesses, but he had met and spoken to King Sika’s daughter, his supposed only daughter Amelia, amiable, but not tempting. ‘Are you okay?’

‘I scared myself a little I think, I was not expecting that.’ She laughed. ‘But overall I am fine.’ She pulled away from him and tidied herself up. When she took a good look at him, she winced. ‘You’re Loki, aren’t you?’

Loki frowned, having never been referred to like such in his life, usually people ensured to use his title too often. ‘Yes, I am.’

‘Damn, that is literally half of your family I have insulted.’ she hid her face in her hands. 

‘I don’t understand.’

‘When your mother came to Alfheim, I spoke to her for a few minutes before I recognised who she was and never once gave her her title, and now I am after doing it with you.’ She giggled nervously. 

‘Have you met my brother yet?’ 

She shook her head, ‘Not on a personal basis, no.’ 

‘Please let me know if you do.’ She laughed again. ‘What is your name?’

‘Clodagh.’ 

Loki frowned, ‘Like the river?’

‘Exactly like the river.’

‘You are named after the River of Alfheim?’

‘Yes.’ 

‘Why?’

‘I don’t know. I think I was told as a child it was my mother’s wish to call me that.’

‘Can you not ask her?’

‘Perhaps someday I will.’ she smiled sadly. ‘I am sorry to have disrupted your day.’ 

‘Not at all, you seem to be in search of something, perhaps I can be of assistance?’ He offered, wanting to know more of the curious Light Elf. 

‘No, I just needed to look for something odd, I don’t think it would be something you would be too aware of the whereabouts of.’

‘You cannot tell for sure if you don’t ask?’ He offered. 

‘It’s a book on hedgehogs and their care, I doubt there is one here specifically for them, but an overall animal book that would help care for them.’

‘Can I ask why?’ He assumed that it was to do with the creature she dealt with the week before, but he could not admit he had been snooping on her before. 

‘I have a friend that needs a little help.’ She explained. 

‘A friend?’ she nodded, causing Loki’s brow to raise. ‘Is this friend tending to a hedgehog?’

‘No, I am,’ she stated, her cheeks glowing slightly in embarrassment. ‘It started out as a minor injury, or so I thought, now it seems to be having other issues.’ 

‘Such as?’ 

‘I am not sure, it seems healthy and is eating a good bit, I need to see what seasons they hibernate here, maybe that’s the issue.’ She rambled, looking to the shelves again. 

‘I thought you mentioned a friend.’ 

‘He is my friend.’

‘You…..are friends…...with a hedgehog?’

‘Yes.’ She stated unashamedly before looking to another shelf. ‘Ooh, there it is.’ she looked up and realised it was far too high for her. ‘I don’t mean to be rude, but could you…’ she moved him slightly to the side and tried her best to climb up to what she needed. 

‘You’re going to hurt yourself.’ Loki magicked the book down. ‘Here you go.’ 

‘Thank you.’ She took the book from him. ‘I will let you get back to what you were doing, I am sure there are women wishing to be in your company.’

‘You’re interested in Thor.’ Loki commented sadly. 

‘I have yet to meet him, I am not the least bit interested in a person I have yet to meet.’ Clodagh laughed. 

‘But you’re… you are one of the princesses, aren’t you?’

‘Yes, sort of.’

‘How is that a “sort of” answer, you have King Sika’s markings so you are his daughter and in turn a princess. Can I ask, how do Light Elves get their markings?’

‘We are born with them, same as Jotnar.’ She smiled, rubbing her hand over the marks of her forearm, similar to tattoos. ‘Do you know Midgardians use needles to give themselves markings?’

‘I read that somewhere before.’ Loki nodded. 

‘Yes, it’s odd, I never really pay any attention to mine.’ She looked at it sadly. 

‘They are Sika’s lineage markings though, aren’t they, I am not gone mad and forgotten…’ he looked intently at the ones he could see. 

‘No, they are. Sika is my father.’ She confirmed. 

‘So Amelia is your sister?’ She nodded. ‘Is it odd, being here like this with your sister?’

‘Sort of, but only because we are not together very often on Alfheim. I love that I am spending time with her now though, we are getting to really enjoy one another’s company.’ 

‘So there is no fighting?’ Clodagh scrunched her nose and shook her head. ‘You’re better than most here.’ 

‘It wouldn’t take much. Thank you, your….’

‘Loki is fine.’

‘Thank you, Loki. I don’t mean to be rude, but I have a hedgehog I need to help.’ She smiled and left with her book. 

Loki went from curious of the girl, to outright smitten with her in that ten-minute conversation.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki and Clodagh spend more time in each other's company, as well as Clodagh meeting Thor and it not going as well as it could. When it comes time to announce the partners for the Aesir princes, something happens.

It continued for another four weeks, girls throwing themselves at the princes and before long, the catty behaviour came out, lies and stories of every manner became normalised gossip of the girls thought to be most in the running, but in that time, Amelia had decided clearly she was not in any way interested in either royal in that manner, though she did enjoy their company, instead, she found herself completely in love with Thor’s friend, meaning the girls ignored her completely.

‘Wait, the red-haired burly one?’ Clodagh looked at her sister, slightly shocked. 

‘No, the one next to him.’

‘The one that looks like you literally just killed his entire family and are sauteing his dog for dinner?’ Clodagh looked at the other two men with Thor, hoping she was not referencing the blonde haired one who somehow managed to have four women on his lap at once. 

‘Oh Clods, you are so cruel. His name is Hogun, do you think Mother and Father would be angry?’

‘He is one of Prince Thor’s closest friends, I don’t think that is looked down upon, what is he like to you, is he nice?’

‘Yes, he is sweet and gave me a beautiful rose the other day as he passed me.’ 

‘Oh Norns, a romantic.’ She baulked. 

‘You have no romance, Clodagh.’

‘If it makes me a giggly little girl I don’t want it.’

‘Shut up.’ Amelia smiled, hitting her sister with a pillow before Clodagh got to her feet. ‘Are you off to the library again? You can do that at home.’

‘Have you any idea of the number of books here Miels, I...honestly I would scrub chamber pots to be allowed stay and keep using that library.’

‘You are the weirdest elf in the worlds, I love you, but you really are.’ Amelia stated as her sister went to leave the room. ‘Take that squeaker with you, it doesn’t shut up when you’re not here.’ 

‘Fine, come on.’ She wrapped the hedgehog in a blanket and brought it in a satchel with her. 

She was sitting in the library, reading silently when the hedgehog started grunting. 

‘Shh, we’ll get in trouble.’ Again it made noise. ‘Fine.’ She began to read to it softly and it ceased making noise, instead getting comfortable and snuggling into a loose ball. 

‘Are you reading to a hedgehog?’ She looked up to see Loki standing nearby. 

‘Yes, I am, he is a fan of good literature.’ she explained. 

‘I wish I had your confidence.’ Her brow furrowed at his comment. ‘You say stuff like that and you do not apologise for it, you are so confident in what you are saying, it is a trait to be admired.’ 

‘Most would think me odd.’ she smiled sadly. 

‘They are envious.’ Loki sat beside her. ‘What did you name him? Spike?’

Clodagh laughed. ‘No, not very original.’ She looked fondly at the sleeping animal. ‘I don’t know, I jokingly called him Mortimer and now Meils is calling him “Morti”.’ 

‘Mortimer is a great name for a literature-loving hedgehog, it must be said.’ Loki grinned, looking at him. 

‘Wanna see something cute?’ She reached into a little bag with a tweezers and pulled out a grub. As soon as she brought it close to the hedgehog, it immediately went from dozing to interested and gobbled it up. 

‘That actually...can I try?’ Loki asked. She handed him the tweezers and he tried. The animal seemed dubious for a moment before taking the grub from him, unrolling after his snack and going over to sniff the Aesir prince. ‘I think I am being inspected.’

‘Careful, he has a terrible bite. The day I found him, his leg was injured so of course, he tried to protect himself, I got a terrible nip, it was terribly deep.’ Loki remained still as the hedgehog sniffed him, seeing him as no threat, he then went back to Clodagh to sleep again. 

‘I think I passed the test.’

‘What test?’

‘Who is allowed talk to his elf.’ 

‘Am I his or is he mine?’ She joked, ‘Not really, he is a wild animal, he will have to go back to the wilds of the gardens sometime soon, I just want him prepared for winter first.’

‘Are elves better at communicating with animals?’

‘I don’t know, we are a more naturally aware species, so perhaps, but I am not sure.’

‘You have an incredible knack with him.’

‘I like to think I do with all my animals.’

‘You have more?’

‘Back home, yes.’

‘Tell me about them.’ he asked. ‘If you don’t mind.’

‘What would you like to hear?’

‘Who is your favourite?’

‘Rua, Rua is this fox that I helped once and now lives close by and visits all the time, especially if it is cold or wet. Then there is Pua, Pua as the name suggests, is a pig, it was abandoned because I think it was supposed to be one of those pet ones but turned out to be a normal one, so yeah, there’s him. Then there is a few more, but they have the biggest personalities. I see your father’s ravens a lot, they are beautiful, they say hello if I am in the gardens.’ 

‘They are nosy things.’

‘Not nosy, curious. They just like to try and understand their world, that is the great thing about ravens, they are so smart, such complex creatures.’

Loki looked at her as she spoke, with caring and passion. ‘You really care about animals.’

‘I do.’ 

‘That’s beautiful.’ 

They sat and spoke for a time more, not knowing who else was in their environs as they spoke of everything and anything. 

‘Brother, there you are, I was looking for….a hedgehog?’ Thor walked over curiously to the pair. ‘Why have you a hedgehog, who is that?’ Thor demanded. 

‘Who?’ Clodagh looked to Loki for an explanation. 

‘My idiot brother is of the opinion we turned someone into a hedgehog, ignore him.’

‘Loki, if you are playing games…’ Thor went to take the animal only to receive a slap on his hand. 

‘Leave him alone,’ Clodagh snapped. ‘Who are you to try and grab him in such a manner?’

‘That is my brother, the future King of Asgard you are talking to.’ Loki chuckled. 

‘Being the future king does not give him right to harm Mortimer. What has he ever done to you?’ She held the hedgehog closer to her. 

‘Loki?’ Thor looked at his brother, shocked at the manner the elf was speaking to him in. 

‘This is Clodagh, one of King Sika’s daughters, she is a bit of an animal enthusiast and poor Mortimer here has been one of her victims.’ She glares at him. ‘Or patient, it's subjective.’ 

‘So that really is a hedgehog?’

‘Yes.’

‘Why is it in the palace?’

‘He is disabled, I am looking after him until he learns to forage with one eye.’ She explained. ‘See, this one is clouded, he cannot use it.’ She pointed out the damaged eye.

‘Right. Well, I suppose I owe you an apology then.’

‘Not really, you owe Mortimer one, though.’

‘What?’ Thor looked to Loki who was grinning widely. 

‘Yes, Thor, apologise to the hedgehog.’ Loki smirked. 

Thor looked down at the animal, who to his shock, was looking up at him expectantly. ‘Is he expecting this?’

‘He is quite intelligent.’ Loki conceded. 

‘Well, I apologise for my accusation to you Loki and for trying to grab the little guy.’ Thor stated. 

Clodagh looked at Mortimer who looked at her for a moment before grunting and curling up. ‘He accepts your apology.’ she informed him. 

‘Good?’ Thor was unsure what to even say to that, causing Loki to chuckle. ‘I have seen you around.’

‘Well I am here because of this idea to get you both wives.’ she smiled. 

‘But you have never introduced yourself.’ 

‘I am not Aesir prince wife material.’ She stated, getting to her feet and opening the satchel for Mortimer to scurry into. ‘I am sorry to be rude, but I need to go somewhere. Sorry, this is three for three with my lack of manners to meeting a member of your family.’ She commented before walking out. 

‘She is very curious.’ Thor noted. 

‘Yes.’ Loki smiled, looking after her. 

‘And Unconventional. She doesn’t seem to adhere to any court etiquette, it is so odd, so….’

‘Refreshing.’ Loki stared to the space she had been. 

Thor looked at his brother with a raised brow. ‘Why, Loki, I do believe you are smitten.’ 

‘How is Princess Kaitlyn?’ 

Thor grinned widely as he thought of the Princess that he met on the very first day that had captured his attention. ‘Very well, as usual. But that will not thwart my comments. You are very much enamoured with this Princess.’ 

‘She is different.’

‘Different does not equate to bad though, does it?’ Thor grinned as he looked at his brother. 

‘No.’ Loki concurred. ‘No it does not.’ 

Neither brother realised they were not alone in the library as they spoke.

 

*

Amelia wrote to her parents, admitting that she was not interested in either prince, nor were either interested in her, but that she very much found herself caring for Hogun, a warrior friend of Prince Thor. Curious as to this man to take their daughter’s heart, Sika and Lydia came to Asgard with their brothers to see this man for the choosing ceremony. On their arrival, they were met by an elated Amelia who did not waste time introducing them to Hogun, who her family could clearly see loved her daughter as she did him, that was all they needed to know. 

Lydia went in search of Clodagh, unsurprised to see an animal in her presence as she spoke to her. ‘How are you finding it here?’

‘Fine.’ Clodagh looked at her awkwardly. 

‘You seem ill at ease.’ 

‘I was never meant for this.’

‘You still feel that way?’ Lydia felt disheartened on her behalf. She always hoped, given the right circumstance, Clodagh would find her place in the worlds, but she seemed to only ever feel lost. She was more at home with animals, but be it palace or countryside, she always felt as though she did not belong, and as a result seemed uncomfortable. 

‘I don’t belong anywhere.’ Clodagh admitted. 

‘We are all required somewhere, you will find your place, as we all do in this life.’ Lydia stated reassuringly. ‘Why not speak with Sika about it?’ Clodagh gave her a peculiar look. She rarely spoke with Sika, usually when they would be forced to my momentary bumping into one another, but it was so awkward, both tried to remove themselves from it immediately. ‘You are as bad as one another.’

‘Must be a natural trait, I am sure some being out there would love to study us.’ Clodagh joked. 

‘I dare say they would.’ Lydia chuckled. ‘So, what can you tell us about this Hogun character?’

‘He makes Amelia so happy, he is courteous and polite and I feel as though she would be happy with him.’ 

‘But that does not make you happy?’ Lydia noted the sadness on Clodagh’s face. 

‘She would stay here with him then, so I will not see her much anymore, I want her to be happy more than anything, same as the boys, but...part of me feels…’ 

‘We would all miss her, but sadly in this life, we cannot have it all our own way, including our sisters leaving realms.’ 

‘I know. I don’t want her to miss out on true happiness.’ 

‘Exactly, now come on, we need to get ready for the ball tonight, the princes have to make their announcement to the realms who they choose.’

Though she thought it was a waste of time, Clodagh did as she was instructed and got ready. Amelia helped her to ready herself, and for the first time since coming to Asgard, Clodagh put effort into her appearance, looking as much a princess as the other women when she came to dinner. 

She and Amelia were talking to the girls they had befriended in their time at the palace, they were unlike the main factions that had formed as they were not interested at the task set to them, they were happier to make alliances so they were not bickering as others were. Knowing this, Frigga put them closest the top table, seeing that they were least likely to act up. It was while everyone was eating, the Aesir royal family at the top table and well within earshot when Laura, the Princess of Vanaheim came over to the table, concerning them all and smiled sweetly. 

‘Clodagh, wow, you actually look like a princess for a change, what a nice difference this is for you.’ 

‘Not all of us are big into certain pursuits like clothes.’ She stated nonchalantly. 

‘No, it is really a princess thing, you wouldn’t really know that though, would you?’ Everyone listening paused what they were doing. ‘I mean, you’re not even a real princess, are you, Clodagh? Afte all, bastards with some hussy Healer on a battlefield don’t really count as Princesses.’


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The ramifications of the words said in the hall.

Stunned silence filled the room. Everyone who heard were staring openmouthed, those who didn’t were quickly told, leading to a tenseness that was incredibly palpable. On the top table, Loki and Thor sat still, having heard what Laura had said perfectly. 

Clodagh stared in front of her at the spoon at the top of her cutlery, she felt every eye in the room on her, her face reddened with shame at not only being revealed as a sham but the manner it was done. Everyone gathered knew what she was, knew the shame she caused her father’s household. Her eyes filled with tears as she realised that not even those she had befriended would want her as such now that she was exposed. As her cruel words pierced through Clodagh’s mind, she rose to her feet and bolted from the room.

‘What sort of twisted cruel cow are you?’ Amelia hissed. ‘How can you look at another person and say those sort of things about them, Clods never once bad mouthed or wronged you.’

‘How can she? I am a princess, all she is a dirty secret.’ Laura sneered. 

*

Clodagh ran until she could run no more, before falling to her knees, she felt as though air could not reach her lungs as the sheer hurt took over her body and she racked with agonising sobs as she cried. She always said those things about herself, because she believed them, but to hear someone else saying them, for them to tell everyone, it only made it seem worst. She tried holding herself in her arms as she cried to keep herself together, but it was no use, she shook as the anguish flooded her. Nothing outside her crying mattered. She felt as though her whole body was being crushed, she felt her breaths were shallow and filled with hiccups as the sobs subsided and she felt cold and broken by what was said. She always felt alone and ostracized, but now more than ever. All she wanted was to feel happy and loved, but she couldn’t even be given that. 

*

In the hall, the stunned silence continued for a time, Amelia had stormed out in search of her sister and everyone else seemed to look around in awkwardness, most people seemed to find their gaze on Lydia and Sika. Sika’s face showed his shame, but Lydia looked genuinely heartbroken. ‘We need to find her.’ She looked to her husband. 

‘We do not know this palace, only Amelia can attempt to find her,’ Her husband responded. 

‘I should not have asked her to endure this.’ Frigga looked guiltily to where Clodagh had been seated. ‘It is my fault she was here, she...that poor girl.’ 

‘There are things none of us can foresee.’ Odin stated in consolation. 

‘I know what young women in search of power are like,’ she retorted. ‘I should have known one of them would do that to her. This is my doing.’ Frigga rose to her feet and walked around the table before going to the Vanir princess. ‘Pack your things.’

Laura’s face fell. ‘What?’

‘I said, pack your things, you are not welcome in this palace any longer. You are not befitting your title, no true Princess would ever speak to another being that way all because she realised that my son prefers another to her.’ 

‘But she is a….’

‘You have done nothing but take liberties since entering this palace, taking a room for yourself on the first day, speaking ill and lies about others and then going and purposely ridiculing a person in a room full of people so to humiliate and belittle them. You are not a princess, you are a cruel vile creature and if you ever set foot in this palace again whilst I am alive I can and will make you suffer the consequences.’ Frigga snapped. 

‘Frigga….’ The girl’s father began. 

‘I am the Allmother, and a queen and you will address me as such, do I make myself clear?’ The Vanir King took a step back in shock. ‘You may be my cousin Frederick but that will not save you from my wrath, what sort of rearing did you give your daughter to let her think her actions today were an acceptable way to treat another creature and that there would be no ramifications for such?’

‘That girl has no right here.’ Laura argued.

‘She has every right.’ The people turned to Loki, who was now standing next to his mother. ‘The rules state every woman born to a King or Queen, there is no stipulation that she has to be born in wedlock or to the ruler’s spouse. The Alfheim royal line is through King Sika, she is his daughter, her markings are as clear as day, ergo she has every right to be here and she has every right to be an acceptable partner.’ Frigga nodded in agreement with her son. ‘Princess Laura, I think I speak for everyone when I say you and your prosthetic adjustments to yourself are very much wanted out of the palace.’ There was a hushed scoffing at his words. ‘Every word that comes out of your mouth is as false as that nose on your face. You think we forget that you were born with a nose like your fathers, but we do not, and when you were busy on your knees in the soldiers quarters, Clodagh was on her knees in the pouring rain untangling a hedgehog from a bush, when you were digging around for horrible words to throw at others, Clodagh was digging around for grubs to feed said animal and when you were contemplating how to scupper girls from catching the eye of the good men in Asgard, she was giving the creature one last farewell before releasing it back into the gardens because she felt it was better to let the animal live naturally even though it broke her heart for her to say goodbye to it. You may have been trained in manners and grace, but she has a kindness and both like nothing I have ever witnessed naturally. According to my brother’s friends, she is already adored around the city for her act of kindness to a child on the day she came here while you are reviled by our staff because you are incredibly untidy and messy to an extent you left a meal in your rooms for a week, smelling them up.’ There was a disgusted groan that. ‘I cannot imagine how you think you have any high standing here, you are an incredibly hateful and unpleasant person, so for you, of all people to think you can speak down to the kindest woman to ever set foot on this realm is laughable when the only difference between her and you is that your father rushed your mother up the aisle with you in her already and Sika did not.’ 

Even Odin’s eyebrows rose at that. 

‘How dare you make such claims.’ Frederick growled. 

‘I think you forget my son’s ability to smell out lies and deceit.’ Frigga smiled. ‘He has a terrible knack of reading his surrounds perfectly, and all those in them. So you see, Laura, there is a lesson here, never assume you hold the moral high ground, because once you play your hand, if you do so in a malicious manner, people who have been silent thus far will play theirs, and you will soon realise you are not as smart as you think you are.’ 

*

‘Clodagh?’ Amelia rushed around, looking for her sister. ‘Where are you?’ she rushed to the gardens, which were dark, making it harder to find someone. ‘Please Clods, answer me.’ 

‘Any sign of her?’ She turned to see Hogun behind her. 

‘No.’ Amelia felt defeated. ‘She...she didn’t want to come, I begged her, so did Mother and the Allmother, she said she didn’t belong, that she wasn’t like the rest of us.’

‘The actions of another are not our doing.’ Hogun stated, pulling her to him. ‘No one can predict what another will say or do.’ 

‘But to do that to her, to be so cruel.’

‘Loki has fallen for her, Laura knew that and wanted to thwart it. Thor made it clear from the beginning who he wanted, she was hoping to stop Loki feeling she was an acceptable partner.’

‘But they are so alike, they would be happy.’ 

‘Yes, that is the problem.’ Hogun agreed. 

 

*

‘How dare that vile witch think she could say such things.’ Eoin paced furiously. 

‘Some people feel that words do not inflict pain.’ Diarmaid stated next to him. 

For the past half hours, Clodagh’s half-brothers stood angrily waiting for word of their sister in their parent’s rooms. 

‘Father should have just pretended she and Amelia were twins from the start, this would never have mattered then.’ Eoin declared. His brothers agreed it was something that they had discussed many times over the years. 

Inside the main areas of their parents' rooms, Sika and Lydia waited. 

‘I should not have allowed this.’ Lydia stated guiltily. ‘I was so desperate for her to find some happiness, maybe even realise there is more to life than hiding in shame over something she has no control over, I never thought some would be so cruel.’

‘I should have sent to her to Midgard.’ Sika declared. 

Lydia gave her husband a warning look, for years Sika insisted that Clodagh would be better served off Alfheim so that she would not be recognised by her markings. ‘You need to accept your part in this.’ 

‘Accept….I accepted the horrific ramifications of my actions the day they occurred, and when she came to the palace…’

‘Not those actions, you have made it damn clear you hold onto them, to the point it is actually irritating now, but to Clodagh.’ He looked at his wife unsure. ‘Why do you remain so distant, that girl needs her parent’s love. Genevieve is dead, she is not able to give her a mother’s love but she has a father, alive and well who adores his other daughter and spoils his grandchildren no end, but who does not even share a conversation with her.’

‘We have spoken.’ 

‘Getting the same lift and asking her if her teachings were adequate is not speaking to her. You failed that girl since the day you helped create her.’ Lydia stated sadly. ‘You have been so busy trying to make it up to me that you never once considered her.’

‘You never fully accepted my apologies.’

‘How can I, when you refuse to apologise to the most innocent being in all of this.’

‘If she had not been born…’

‘But she was, she exists, and you acting as though it is some terrible inconvenience to us all is not working. She hates herself because she feels as though she is at fault for this, but she was never the one at fault, was she?’ Lydia snarled. ‘You are the one that has caused this mess day one and you have yet to show that girl it is not her fault. She did not ask to be conceived, she is not responsible for how she came to be and it is not her fault that you have failed her ever since.’


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clodagh flees the situation, as everything is forced to a head with other people.

Clodagh finally pulled herself together enough to breathe and get to her feet again, looking around, she realised she had made her way outside to one of the side gardens of the palace. There she noticed she had company. ‘At least I know you don’t care what I am.’ Her voice was tight and small. The raven cawed before swooping down to her. ‘You’re so beautiful.’ She smiled, the bird toyed with her hair, as though trying to cheer her up. ‘I need to get away from here.’ It cawed again and took flight, its actions telling her to follow it. She did as requested and found herself somewhat startled when the animal led her to the stables. She walked in and looked at the different horses asleep in their stalls. Only one horse seemed awake, a beautiful midnight black stallion, he watched with curiosity as she walked towards him. ‘Hey, beautiful boy.’ The horse snorted. ‘Yeah, you don’t need to be told that, you know you’re gorgeous.’ she extended her hand and let the animal smell it, the horse raised its head more and sniffed up her arm to her face, when its nostrils snorted over her, she smiled and blew some air back at the horse, causing its ears to come fully forward and to extend its neck to snort her again, so she repeated her action. ‘Are you broken?’ She asked sadly. The horse snickered. Looking around, she opened the stable door and let the horse out before using a bale of hay to allow her onto its back. Pointing it towards the stables door, she pressed in her heels and the horse cantered off. 

She did not stop until she ran out of path, she aimed it at the Bifrost and the horse did the rest, when she got to the far end of it, to the gate itself, she eased the horse to a halt and looked at the golden building. She had no idea how to call the Gatekeeper, or if she could speak to him in hopes to let her pass, but she felt she had to try. Walking in, she was startled to see him standing staring out at the stars. ‘The Allfather has not given you permission to be here.’

‘Is it required?’

‘Usually, but there are extenuating circumstances to everything. Being humiliated in the manner that you were today would certainly be deemed reason enough to not hang around and obtain permission.’

‘Please, I just want to go home.’ she begged. 

‘Running from our problems will never solve them.’ Heimdall commented as he walked over to the machine and stuck his sword in. ‘But sometimes distance gives clarity.’ 

Clodagh had no idea what he meant by his words but she said nothing more other than giving her thanks as the machine came to life and pointed in the direction of Alfheim once more. Walking into it, she felt relieved. 

When the machine died down once more, Heimdall looked to Huginn, ‘I think your Master would wish to know what you assisted with.’ The raven cawed back at him and flew off. ‘It will be interesting to see what Loki says to his horse being loose also.’ he chuckled. 

*

‘She is on Alfheim.’ Odin declared as he walked into Sika and Lydia’s rooms. ‘She used the Bifrost not ten minutes ago, she returned to her dwelling there.’

‘At least she is safe.’ Lydia sighed in relief. 

‘Yes.’ Sika nodded, but he said no more. 

‘Sika, may we speak in private for a moment?’ The two queens and the other king looked at the Allfather in concern, but Sika nodded and Frigga and Lydia left the rooms, claiming to need to tell Amelia. ‘You never mentioned her.’

‘How could I, did I not bring enough shame to my family without adding to it by talking freely of it.’

‘Your actions were the shame, not her. That girl has no idea how to act around others, did you have her kept in a farmyard, she doesn’t even know how to curtsy, she came here and has been on an upward slope the entire time.’ Sika looked adequately ashamed. ‘Loki has decided on her, the poor girl has to be trained in years of training in a matter of months, how is that fair to her?’ 

‘Odin, she….how can you want…’

‘You do realise your daughter is seen as one of the most pure-hearted people in all the realms, don’t you? She is adored by those who know her, your family included, your wife, the woman that has every right to baulk at the sight of her, adores her like a mother should, she stands waiting to accept her as her own but cannot for you do not accept her.’ 

‘I cannot…’

‘You will not, if you are going to speak, at least be honest man, this is nothing to do with “can”.’ Odin growled. ‘Now, Thor has taken his partner, Loki will have to go to a different realm to get his back, but he will get her, when I tell him where she is.’ There was a knock on the door. ‘Just as I mention, so shall he appear. Enter.’ Loki entered the room. ‘She has returned to Alfheim.’ 

‘I will go at once.’ He turned to leave, looking at a servant, ‘Have the stables ready my horse.’

‘Your horse is no use to you.’ He turned to look at his father. ‘She used him to get to the Bifrost.’

‘What?’

‘Yes, you heard me.’ Odin chuckled. ‘That animal, that creature known only to be loyal to you has let someone else on his back.’

‘It does not count if it is her.’

‘Why is that?’

‘You have not seen her with animals, Father. They adore her, even your ravens, they fly to find her and she speaks to them….you cannot understand unless you see it, animals love her greatly.’

‘A sign of a good heart.’ Odin nodded. ‘I will see you on your return, I wish you luck, Son.’ Loki bowed and left. 

‘He could have had any of those girls.’ Sika stated. 

‘Yet he chose your daughter.’ Odin commented. ‘Can you not see so many do not see the means by which she came to be as something to worry about?’

*

Loki arrived at the Bifrost slower than he would have liked, but when he arrived there, he was glad to see his horse. He magicked the horse’s tack on and guided the animal into the Bifrost. ‘I am pretty sure my father asked that the Bifrost remain closed this evening.’ Loki commented as he set eye on the Guardian. 

‘Yet here you are, seeking passage.’

‘I have his consent, and you know that. She did not.’

‘After what occurred, I was not going to add to her torment, away from those who were so vile to her, she will be more likely to listen to those of sound mind.’ Heimdall stated before sticking his sword in the gateway once more. ‘She is where she is happiest.’ 

That told Loki little, but he mounted his horse and had it move towards the Bifrost. When he arrived at the other side, he looked around curiously. He was in a forest, or at the edge of one at least, and close by a small farming house, quaint and beautiful, something told Loki this is where he would find Clodagh. He walked up and knocked on the door, a maid answered. ‘Sorry to bother you, but is there a Clodagh here?’

‘Around back, where else would she be at this hour?’

Loki thanked her and walked around the stone building. Where it was night on Asgard, it was the middle of the day in Alfheim. He was about to turn the last corner when a voice stopped him. 

‘He was lovely, the sweetest little hog, you would have loved him.’ 

Loki could feel his heart swelling when he heard Clodagh, of course she would talk of Mortimer. He glanced around the corner and smiled. She was telling a fox about him, what else would she do, he laughed to himself. 

‘You should have heard what she said Rua.’ Loki’s heart crushed in his chest at the heartbroken tone of her voice. ‘I should never have gone there, they all just looked at me, they knew the truth.’ 

Loki turned the corner to see the fox nudging her in a consoling manner. ‘Clodagh?’

She looked up, shocked to see him there. ‘What…?’

‘So this is Rua?’ He walked over. 

‘What are you doing here?’

‘I came to speak with you.’

‘Why?’

‘To see if you are okay, what that….what she did, she had no right.’

‘It is true, though.’

‘That is why you never thought you belonged at the choosing with others?’ Loki sat beside her. ‘Why you are so different.’

‘I’m a Bastard.’ she stated sadly. 

‘I didn’t even think that sick term was still in use. Do you know on Jotunheim, as there is no marriage, though they are monogamous, they are not wed, so there is no such thing as….well, that word.’ Loki looked at her. ‘What...how….?’

‘In the war, Sika….he, well, we know what he did. I don’t know if she was a healer, she died when I was born, I killed her. That’s why I have no idea why I am called after the Clodagh.’ 

‘She’s….’ Clodagh nodded. ‘I am sorry.’

‘I never knew her.’ Clodagh shrugged. 

‘I would think that worse, you never felt her love.’ She gave a small head shake. ‘I’m so sorry. It is my fault.’

‘How?’ Clodagh pondered. 

‘If I did not exist, you would not have caught Laura’s attention.’

‘That makes no sense.’

‘Neither does blaming yourself for her attacking you like that, yet you seem to think it is.’ Clodagh said nothing back. ‘It’s beautiful here.’

‘Yes, it is.’ She gave a weak smile and looked around. 

‘So, this is Rua, where’s Pua, and why do they rhyme?’ 

‘That was not intentional.’ She giggled as she dried some tears. 

‘Why didn’t you tell me?’

‘How can I tell someone I am a bastard?’

‘Please stop using that word, it is horrible.’ He pleased. 

‘It’s what I am though, a filthy, sordid bastard, I am nothing but a terrible reminder that my mother was a harlot and my father an adulterer, I am not worthy of even being allowed in the presence of decent men, I am the last…’ Loki did not know how to silence her any other way, he had to tell her to stop ridiculing herself so viciously and also display his emotions all at once, so he pressed his lips to hers, praying that she felt the same. ‘What…?’ She looked at him befuddled when he pulled back. ‘Why?’

‘I love you. I am completely in love with you. You have no idea of court etiquette, you talk to animals and there is not a member of my family you have introduced yourself to properly and if you are not the woman I have by my side for the rest of my life then I want no woman.’ He declared. 

‘But...I’m…’

‘Do not dare call yourself that again, ever, please, never. That word is nothing but letters next to each other to make a sequence of sounds, that does not make you. You are so kind, gentle and sweet, I could never want another. For Norn's sake, you get drenched to tend to hedgehogs, you come home from a terrible experience and you talk to a fox, you are so unique and perfect that the idea of you ever changing breaks my heart, I cannot bear to even think about it.’

‘But I am not good enough for you.’

‘You risk illness to look after a hedgehog, how in the Norns do you think I can find a woman better than that. I am not able to think of another as kind-hearted as you, that is why I know you are good enough, I love you, Clodagh.’ He admitted. ‘Legitimately born or not, I love you.’

Loki spent the evening with Clodagh at the dwelling she called home, it was quaint and well tended and showed how she had never known to be a princess, as she had no sign of being raised as one. ‘Not very fancy, is it?’ She asked, looking at him as he looked around her room. 

‘No, but that does not mean anything bad, look how incredible you are.’ He played with her hair. 

They fell asleep that night after hours of talking with one another. The bedroom door was open and the maids of the house knew nothing beyond a few kisses and talking occurred. When they woke in the morning, Loki spent his time encouraging her to come to with him to Asgard, it was difficult, but he finally persuaded her.

They sat on his horse and slowly walked to the city, Clodagh insisting that they had to be slow and steady, it was only fair. To the horse as there were two people on his back instead of one, causing Loki to again realise how caring she is.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki and Clodagh speak with his family and hers, as well as the trickster prince finally speaking to her father regarding her.

Loki held Clodagh’s hand as they walked through the palace. Some of the princesses were still walking around, some had left to go home already. They watched as Loki and Clodagh walked by, even paying attention to how Loki stood protectively next to her. There were whispers and looks, but they paid little heed to them. They did not stop until Loki brought her to a corridor she had never seen before, there were only a few doors on it and all spread apart and with guards outside every room. He walked to the far end, to the largest doors, gold emblems covered it. It did not take more than a second to know whose they were. Loki knocked twice and a servant answered, they walked in and requested to speak with his parents. The servant told them that the Allmother and Allfather were currently elsewhere, but that they would retrieve them, so to remain there as they sought them. 

Loki brought Clodagh to a chair to sit, but she never reached the seat, instead she rushed off to the other side of the room. Confused he looked to see where she was going, smiling a moment later when he realised who was there. 

‘Hey boys, did you miss me?’ The two ravens cawed. ‘Hey, I have two hands, don’t worry, I can play with you both. So...what did you do after I left yesterday, hmm?’ One of them toyed with her hair. ‘Well I hardly meant him, I haven’t seen this one in three days, I thought I offended you.’ The other raven cawed. 

Loki watched as she interacted with the two birds. They seemed to almost speak with her, it was incredible to see two animals he had known to always be very reserved be so animated with her. He realised then that they were far more outgoing than he realised, and why his father always kept them. He turned slightly to sit down only to realise that his parents had entered the room again without their noticing. His father watching curiously as Clodagh spoke with the birds, scratching Muninn’s chin. ‘He’s never let me do that.’

Clodagh turned slightly, startled to hear more voices in the room. ‘You mustn’t do it right then.’ She smiled as Huginn tossed some of her hair in his beak, looking for more attention. ‘Fine, you spoilt featherbrain.’ She smiled as she toyed with the feathered between his eyes.

Loki found himself laughing at the fact that the first time Clodagh had met every member of his family, she had not shown one of them the correct manner of greeting. He looked to his mother, who seemed to be thinking the same and then to his father, who knew of her slight fault and was incredibly curious as to her actions nonetheless. ‘We returned a few minutes ago.’ Loki informed his parents, knowing better than to draw attention to Clodagh’s slight faux pas. 

‘How was Alfheim?’

‘Incredibly peaceful, bar a fox that seemed to think I was planning to steal its spot.’ 

‘Rua has slept there for several years, you shouldn’t have sat there, I warned you.’ 

‘It was the warmest seat in the house and that fox has a thick coat.’ 

‘Well he was there before you, so you have to lump it.’ She stated factually. ‘I couldn’t come in here and expect you guys to give me your perch, could I?’ She asked the ravens, immediately, Huginn moved to one side and Muninn the other making considerable room in the middle. ‘Is that for me?’ they both cawed. ‘Well, you two are just too good.’ 

The Aesir royals watched in awe as Clodagh seemed to forget where she even was to interact with the animals. 

‘She is going to insult and blank every Lord and foreign dignitary in this realms.’ Odin chuckled. 

‘They need a good dressing down most of them.’ Frigga smiled back before walking over to Clodagh. ‘Your father and...what do you call Lydia?’

‘Just Lydia.’ 

‘I see, they are anxious to know of your return.’ Clodagh looked away. ‘It is important that this all is done properly.’

‘There’s nothing proper about it though.’ 

Frigga tilted her head slightly in acknowledgement of the fact. ‘True, but I dare say you don’t want to be giving the little brats more to comment on.’ She linked her arm and gently pulled Clodagh away from the two ravens and passed Loki, who quickly joined them. ‘Family is important, I know you love your siblings terribly, they are all here and are very insistent on seeing you.’

‘But how could they have thought I would be back?’

‘You are known to be stubborn, but I suppose I can leave you in on a little secret now you are marrying my son…..Loki is as stubborn as a mule, he gets it from his father.’

‘I heard that.’ Odin growled. 

‘Did I sound like I was whispering?’ She gave a side glance at her husband. ‘Loki stay here.’

‘NO!’ Immediately Clodagh reached out for Loki, who took her hand in his. ‘I can’t do this alone, I need him there.’

‘But your family…’

‘When Sika and Lydia were told of Hogun and my brother’s partners, they were seen as family right then, that stands for me too, if they asked that we have time as family, it always includes partners, it is the Light Elf way.’ Frigga could not argue that and nodded slightly, leaving Loki to take Clodagh to her family, neither speaking en route. 

When they arrived at the area of the palace that held where her family were staying, Clodagh paused outside the room. ‘Hey, are you okay?’ Loki looked to her in concern. 

‘I don’t know.’ She admitted. ‘I know I love them, but I never felt….They aren’t really….Family is more than genetic links.’ 

‘Yes, it is, but they love you, you matter to them, they are your family.’ Loki insisted. ‘You should have seen Amelia’s face when you left, she wanted to tear Laura apart, your brothers, they had to be restrained physically when Laura’s father acted as though she did nothing wrong.’ 

‘Pointing out the truth is not wrong.’

‘If she said to you in private, can I ask if you are….illegitimate, that is not being cruel and vindictive, she, however, declared to the whole room that you were and called you a horrific word doing it, then she tried to justify herself. There is no justifying that.’ Loki kissed her chastely. ‘Come on.’ He knocked on the door and a maid answered, immediately making room when she realised who was standing there. 

On walking in, Amelia, who was sitting between Hogun and Eoin rushed to her feet and hugged her sister to her. ‘Clods.’ she cried into her sister’s shoulder. ‘I’m so sorry.’

‘It wasn’t your fault.’

‘She is so horrible, you missed the Allmother and Loki tearing her apart in the hall for what she did, it was brilliant.’ Amelia promised. 

‘I suffered humiliation, it does not mean I approve of others suffering it.’ Clodagh gave Loki a small glance, Loki looked back unapologetically. 

Her brothers and their families spoke with her too, her nephew sitting on her lap, adoring her attention as she made funny faces and tickled him, giving him her full attention as she played with him. Loki watched her, she was similar with the child as she was with animals, kind and caring with a genuine smile on her face. He noted the absence of Sika once more and frowned. For a moment, his eye caught Lydia’s and she seemed to read his thoughts and indicated to the other room. Loki said nothing but his face said everything. Standing back slightly as Eoin spoke with his sister, he became still. 

Loki left his doppelganger in the room with Clodagh and his family and teleported himself into the other room, where he saw King Sika sitting looking out at Asgard. The king seemed to realise he was no longer alone and looked around, frowning to Loki. ‘You brought her back.’

‘Yes.’

‘Thank goodness.’ it was clear from Sika’s tone and features that he was relieved, but still he remains in a separate room, away from her. 

‘I need to ask why you do this.’ Loki stated, walking forward. ‘Clodagh is so incredible, so kind and good and you clearly know this yet you treat her as though she is a pariah.’ 

‘She is not…’

‘Of course she isn’t, hence you being in here and not out there talking to her, reassuring her that what was said to her yesterday is nothing but lies and envy, and of course, you were so forthcoming with defending her when Laura verbally attacked her and called her a…’

‘Don’t.’ Sika begged. ‘Don’t call her that word.’

‘When you say nothing against those that call her it, you condone her being called it. You acting as though she does not exist until my mother brought her here tells people she is only something to be gossiped about.’ Loki stated. ‘You claim to hate that word but do you know Clodagh calls herself that, she hates how she came to be so much she thinks that it is an apt term for her.’ Sika swallowed shamefully. ‘You are the reason she cannot accept herself, the way you act regarding her…’

‘Lydia…’

‘Queen Lydia adores her, Lydia wants to be recognised as her stepmother and accept her into your house but she cannot because Clodagh is your daughter biologically and as a result, only you can start the process. Your son’s maintain she and Amelia should have been raised as twins and no one be allowed know the truth.’ Loki informed him. ‘You are so busy worrying about insulting Lydia, who has long accepted all of this that you have done nothing but insult Clodagh, making her feel as though she is not worthy.’

‘It was all my fault, I…’

‘You have her thinking it is hers, you do know that? It’s odd, my father tells me of the valiant manner you fought the Tridiens, yet the man I see before is frightened to love his daughter. How do you think she feels when she sees you love your other children, how do you think that feels? Do you know her, do you know how beautiful and pure she is? You think her filthy and sordid, yet she is as pure as the freshest snow, but how could you know, you refuse to get to know her.’ 

Sika looked sadly at the door, knowing that in the room on the other side, his daughter along with his wife and other children, sat in the room and thought of Loki’s words. ‘You care for her?’

‘I do.’ Loki confirmed.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sika and Clodagh speak alone, for the first time ever.

Sika exited the bedroom to his surprised family, startled to see Loki standing close to them. He looked behind him into the room where Loki had been a few moments before only to see it was empty. He looked to Loki again, who was grinning slyly. 

‘Father?’ Eoin looked to his father concerned. 

Sika, is everything alright?’ Lydia asked. 

‘I need you all to leave for a few minutes.’ Sika declared. The family look amongst themselves, Clodagh was the first to head for the door. ‘I need to speak with you.’ She did not even turn to see who Sika was speaking to, never thinking he could be referencing her. ‘Clodagh.’ 

That was when she turned. She had never heard Sika say her name, not once in nigh on a thousand years. She looked at Loki worried, then to Lydia and her siblings but she did not look at Sika. 

Though apprehensive, the others did eventually do as requested and left. For a few moments, after they left, father and daughter remained stoic still and silent. ‘I need to give official confirmation to the Allfather that you are alright with this matching.’ He stated after a time. 

‘I am not suited to the position.’

In truth, Sika was startled, he had assumed from Loki’s declaration that Clodagh wanted it as he did. ‘So you have no feelings for Prince Loki?’

‘I do.’

‘Then I do not understand what you are saying.’ 

Clodagh sighed. ‘I am not suited to being Prince Loki’s bride. He needs someone trained in the role, I have not trained in any way to such a role. I have met all four members of his family, I acted as though the Allmother was some woman from the forests, I backed into him in the library, I slapped Prince Thor and I blanked the Allfather, that is how I met the Aesir royal family, does that sound like it went well? For the past few weeks Amelia has been shoving etiquette and procedure down my throat, I have a headache thinking about it and then the Allmother said I would be forced to learn more. These are princess things, I am not a princess. Dressing in fancy dresses and putting on Amelia’s jewellery does not make me a princess, I am just some bastard playing dress-up, parading around as one.’ 

Sika looked at Clodagh in shock. He knew from Lydia’s comments that she was never overly comfortable with herself, but to hear her call herself such things. ‘There is no need for that word.’

‘What one do you prefer, baseborn, illegitimate, impure, mongrel? They all mean the same thing. I am being called them all right now in this very palace, probably in this very hallway. You getting offended by it will not stop them talking.’ 

‘Lesser beings speak like that, why allow yourself think as they do?’

‘I was born to a married man and apparently a camp healer, what else can I be called?’ Clodagh half demanded. 

Sika looked guilty for a moment before looking at her, ‘What do you mean “apparently”?’

‘I wouldn’t know, would I, she died.’

‘You don’t...no one told you about her?’

Clodagh swallowed sadly. ‘No. who could I possibly ask, I don’t know her name so I cannot see if she has family.’ 

‘You don’t even….’ 

‘It’s not like I can ask Lydia, is it?’ She pointed out. ‘You weren’t exactly forthcoming either.’ 

‘Well, since the...with…’ Sika could not answer. 

‘Was she a healer?’ 

‘Her names was Genevieve, she was a healer, yes. A damn good one, she saved men that had no right surviving the attack they did.’ Sika sat against a table as he spoke, remembering the woman that for so long he feared to think of. ‘She was young, about your age now when she came to the camp. She...she was a very beautiful soul, she used to have a way that settled the ill, it made them trust her more.’ Clodagh swallowed. ‘I do not know if her family still live, her mother was alive when you were born, she was the one to bring you to the palace.’

Clodagh felt a terrible pain in her chest. ‘She didn’t want me?’

‘No, she did, but your markings, they are so noticeable.’ he looked to her arms, the swirls of design identical to his. ‘She knew that there would be more talk if you stayed away, she wanted the best for you.’

‘I am sure thrown aside into a woods is not what she wanted. But it is easier to ignore things when they are out of the way, right?’

‘That is not why...you do not understand.’

‘No, I don’t.’ she concurred. ‘I cannot understand because you never told me any of this, you never once bothered to…’ she exhaled. ‘This...this is too much.’ she walked towards the door. ‘I am sorry, I am sorry for the embarrassment and dishonour of all of this.’ 

‘It is I that should be apologising to you,’ Sika declared. ‘You never did anything wrong, yet you are the one to suffer for my actions.’ 

‘You were hardly alone and I doubt that she didn’t know you were married.’ 

‘It does not make you the guilty party, regardless.’

‘I am the result of the actions, I am quite literally born of it.’

‘That does not make you bad.’

‘What does it make me, because it sure as Hell makes me feel it?’

‘None of this was ever your doing, I am to blame for any dishonour to the family, not you. You had no part in this, you are innocent.’ Sika stated adamantly. 

‘Then why have I always felt that it is my fault?’ Clodagh began to feel her eyes fill with tears. ‘Lydia is so lovely, so good and I…’

‘No, not you, it was never you.’ Sika reiterated, remembering the joyous face of his wife on his return from war, and then the heartbreak in her eyes when Clodagh was brought to them, her marking clear to see. ‘I was wrong. I was a married man, I should have done what was right, but do you know something Clodagh, I regretted being a bad husband, I regretted not telling Lyddie on my return, but I do not regret that you exist.’ She looked at him, startled to see his tear-filled eyes. ‘I see what you do, you light up a room you are in with joy and happiness, no one can help themselves, you just make them want to be happy. I hear my grandchildren talk about how you are their favourite of their aunts and uncles, each one of them.’ Clodagh smiled at that. ‘I read Amelia’s letter, telling us about Hogun, promising that he was good, all we had to do is ask you, that you would attest he was worthy. She holds your opinion so greatly. Then there is the Allfather, telling me that his ravens, the same birds that tried to peck out people’s eyes actively seek you for attention. And Prince Loki telling the whole hall that you are knee deep in a puddle, head in the bushes looking after a blasted hedgehog, stopping carriages in the middle of a street to pick up a child’s doll because she dropped it, talking to her as a true royal should. You were not here five minutes and you had them wishing for you as a choice for the princes. Any man would be proud to have such a daughter.’ She stared at him, shocked. ‘I have failed you so terribly. I should have treated you as a father should since the beginning, I did not want to hurt Lydia any further, but in doing that, I hurt her, and you, so much more. I have not been a man, I was a coward. You deserved a caring father, the way I treat the others and then act as though you were not there, Norns you must loathe me, I can see why you avoid being around.’ 

‘No, I...I didn’t want to embarrass you more.’

‘You are not an embarrassment.’

‘I have been one, the Aesir royal family, my actions….’

‘They adore you, Prince Loki loves you, Queen Frigga tore that witch asunder in the hall for her actions against you, King Odin, he dared King Frederick to keep talking, Prince Thor was asked to refrain your brothers from getting at King Frederick and he refused. You are so adored by them. You should despise me, but instead, you fear disappointing me, you never could, I have disappointed you. I should have kept you at the palace and raised you as you are, a princess, you may not feel like one, but you are. You look like my mother, she was the crowned princess, my father married into the line. Admittedly, you are slightly different in appearance, you have your mother’s skin tone, but that is, by no means, something to complain about. Prince Loki does not seem to mind.’ He gave a faint smile, looking at her as she eyed him almost suspiciously. ‘I can hardly blame you for being skeptical, I have given you every reason to believe I do not hold you in high regard, but I swear to you, Clodagh, I am so proud of you, I look at you, your goodness and resilience and I see the incredible elf you have become and I cannot help but be proud even though I did nothing to earn that right.’ 

Clodagh’s throat was tight. ‘I thought you hated me.’ she admitted in a small voice. 

‘No, no I could never hate you, you were always such a truly good child, the day you came to the palace, the day you were born, you looked up at me, and as soon as I saw you, you just looked straight at me, even with my shameful actions coming to light, I loved you, you are my daughter, my flesh and blood, you were my first little girl, after three boys.’ He gave a slightly bigger smile. ‘I have always been frightened to show you or to admit it, but I love you Clodagh, since the start, since you extended a little hand up out of the blanket to try and make contact with me. You tried so hard, I failed you. I can only beg your forgiveness. I will give your dowry as is the norm, but if you truly do not think it a suitable match, I will inform the Allfather.’

‘Dowry?’

‘Yes, all princesses have a dowry.’ 

‘I...You...No, you shouldn’t have to.’ She turned to leave again.

‘I have to. For Norn's sake, I am your father.’ Sika growled. ‘You are my daughter, it is only right.’

‘You have nothing to do with me though, I am the odd one out, I have been nothing but a bother since the beginning, you must have been desperate to drown me in the river of my name.’

‘I did not name you after that river because I wanted to harm you in it, how could you think such a thing?’

Clodagh stared at him. ‘You…..you named me?’

‘Yes.’

‘But mothers name their children.’

‘Your mother never got to name you. Her mother said that she never even got to know you were a girl.’ Clodagh felt her legs give way and she slumped to the floor, Sika rushed over and held her. ‘I named you, it was something I took great honour and consideration in. The Clodagh is the life-giver of Alfheim, without it, we could never survive there. It nurtures everything in our realm, without it, there is no Alfheim.’ 

Clodagh contemplated his words. ‘I didn’t realise….’

‘The army remained by the Clodagh for the time of the war as much as was possible. In one battle, jumping into it is all that saved us. That river means everything to Alfheim, I thought….what better name for a child than to show her she is as valuable as that river.’

‘You say these things, but you never once acted that way.’ She pointed out. 

Sika sighed. ‘Not to you, no, but internally…’ He walked into the other room and walked out again holding a set of ledgers of some sort and put them on the table near her. ‘I have one of these for the five of you, yours is the fourth one is yours, obviously.’ They looked at one another for a short time before she seemed to realise that he was expecting her to go over to it. She did so, taking out the book with IV on it and opened it. As she glanced over a few lines, her eyes widened. ‘You see, I always cared, I was just so terrible at showing it. I wronged you, my beautiful and wonderful Clodagh, I am so sorry.’

‘I...I need to....’

‘I understand.’ He nodded, he watched silently as she gave him back the book and look him in the eye for the first time he could remember.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clodagh thinks over everything.

Clodagh did not seek out Loki, instead, she sat thinking through her thoughts. Sike loved and cared for her as he did her sister and brothers, he named her and told her of her mother, but was it all enough? Part of her wanted to say no, that he never showed her, but she knew his guilt, it had been him admitting to it in private when she was a child to his brother, her uncle, that caused her to manifest such guilt for how she had ruined the family. She never told anyone, but one night, after a terrifying dream, she had thought to go to Sika, the innocence of youth causing her to think her father, like the fathers in the stories she read, would protect her from the scary nightmares. She got to the corridors outside his and Lydia’s rooms when she heard him speaking to Njall regarding her. Njall stated she should be cast out, sent to some realm like Midgard to stop shaming Sika and his family, but Sika declined, saying it was not right, the shame would only be added to now the realm knew of her and were she to not be seen again after, they could be forced to deal with insidious accusations as to where she had gone. That it was better to just have the shame that was, people seemed to see it just as some silly fling on a battlefield resulting in a bastard, nothing more. Hearing that, that had been when she realised just how different she was to the others she called her siblings, why Eoin looked at her oddly, the oldest of the king’s children seemed to spend long periods of time just watching but he ceased and started treating her like he did Amelia after a day that Njall spoke to her. She could not remember what he said, but it was the last time she ever saw her uncle. 

She frowned as she knew her uncle was alive and well, she heard of him in news several times as recent as the past year, but there was no sign of him when she was around. She knew she was not around too often at the palace, but she never saw him as she used to. Curiosity got the better of her and she went in search of her eldest brother. She found him in his rooms with his family, his wife Brie, sitting with their young son Stefan on her lap, as soon as he saw her he stretched out his arms for her to take him. Remembering what Sika said about the children adoring her, she smiled at him and took him. 

‘Are you okay?’ Eoin looked at her worriedly. 

‘I wanted to ask you something.’ He nodded. ‘Uncle Njall.’ Eoin’s jaw clenched. ‘What happened?’

‘Why?’

‘Eoin, please, just be honest, what happened, why has he not been at the palace when I was there since I was young?’

‘Brie, can you go to another room with Stefan for a minute, please.’ Brie did as he asked and left the room. ‘When you were younger, Njall wanted to have you sent away.’

‘I know, I remember hearing him, Midgard.’

‘Yes, Father never wanted it, he never admitted it, but he wanted you kept with us.’

‘He told me.’

‘Just now?’ She nodded. ‘Yeah, he didn’t know how to tell anyone and he felt guilty, but he didn’t want you gone, he locked himself in his rooms for a month when you were moved out of the palace.’ She frowned. ‘You were moved out when you were three hundred, you lived in it before that, just in a different set of rooms. But Njall, he saw you as a disgrace, so when Father would not cast you out, he took matters into his own hands. He realised Father loved you and wanted you with us, so he took you.’ She stared in shock. ‘Yes, he got as far as the gateway when Father’s guards caught him. Do you remember any of this?’ She shook her head. ‘Yes, you were quite young and you had no reason to not trust him, he was banned from the palace since.’ 

‘Oh.’ 

‘What happened after we left? Between you and Father.’

‘He explained himself, as best he could, about everything.’

‘And?’

‘And what, he explained himself, he didn’t have to.’

‘You needed to know, Mother and I knew it, I went snooping at his books one day, Liam was there too, and I found our books, we wanted to look at our achievements that he noted, our pictures, yours was there, as detailed as mine. I actually found out your birthday from that, I never knew it beforehand. He cares about you, Clods, he just….with Mother….’

‘Yeah, he said.’

‘So, when am I getting another Brother-In-Law?’

‘You have one now? How long were we talking?’ Eoin laughed at her joke. ‘I don’t know.’ 

‘He clearly likes you, a lot, and you like him, so what is the issue?’

‘I am not meant for this life, I am a cottage in a forest type person, not a huge palace in a city person.’ 

Eoin sighed, knowing that Clodagh did indeed prefer the country. ‘So, are you going to decline him?’

‘I think I might have to.’ She nodded, sniffing as she did. 

‘But you don’t want to?’

‘No.’ 

‘Only you could end up in this mess, Clods.’ He joked. 

‘I am nothing but trouble.’

Eoin’s smile fell. ‘Stop that. You are not trouble, you never were; so cease that right now. Norns, the amount of times Mother said she wished we could be as good as you were, you were the well behaved one.’

*

Clodagh wandered the gardens for a while, not talking to anyone, thinking over what was her history, the history she had been utterly oblivious to. She heard a snort and found herself smiling as she turned around but her smile fell again. There behind her was Mortimer, in the arms of Loki. 

‘Which of us are you unhappy to see?’ Loki asked, though he felt he knew the answer. 

‘Neither, I am just so confused right now, the idea of speaking to another is difficult.’

‘Then we have two options, I leave or I remain as moral support but remain silent unless spoken to.’ 

‘I would like the latter.’

‘Then the latter it is.’ Loki gave a single nod. ‘After I gloat at how he likes me now, of course.’ 

Clodagh gave a small laugh. ‘It’s not hard to.’ she turned and began to walk again. 

For half an hour, they paced the gardens, without a word, when finally, Clodagh sat under a tree, Loki remained standing looking at her, her face telling him she wanted to talk. ‘So, I take it you decline?’

‘I am not well suited to this, I will embarrass and humiliate you and the circumstances of my existing, I do not want you to wonder every time I speak to someone that I am being untoward with them.’

Loki took a moment to process what she was saying. ‘On the first point, I can argue that your severe lack of the usual princess etiquette was the first thing that drew me to you, you genuinely could not be any more different and that is how I knew there could be only you, and secondly, no, you being the result of Sika and your mother’s actions does not cast doubt on you, I see how you are about it, I know how you are about it, I know you would never consider such a thing.’

‘Genevieve.’

‘What?’

‘My mother’s name is Genevieve.’

‘That’s a really nice name.’ Loki commented. 

Clodagh nodded. ‘And I am called after the Clodagh because of its meaning to Alfheim.’

‘Did Sika tell you this?’ She nodded. ‘Well, at least now you know. The Clodagh is integral to sustaining life on Alfheim, no Clodagh, no Light Elf home. She must have thought you meant the world.’

‘She didn’t name me.’ Loki frowned. ‘Sika did.’ 

‘I thought on Alfheim….’

‘She didn’t survive the birth, she never even knew if I made it.’ Loki sat beside her and put an arm around her in support, Mortimer trundled onto her lap. ‘I am so mixed up right now.’

‘I’m here.’ Loki stated. 

‘I...I don’t want to say yes or no, not until I know what’s going on in my head.’

‘Then say nothing, for now, take your time. I don’t want to scare you away, I’ll wait, happily.’

‘Thank you.’ 

‘Do you want to talk about it?’

‘He loves me, apparently. But he never knew how to show it.’

‘To love you, in his mind, was to disrespect Lydia further, it is like that silly voice in your head that tells you that you are an embarrassment, the voice in his says that Lydia was hurt enough.’

‘He cast out my uncle because he tried to have me taken away and raised elsewhere for being an embarrassment.’ 

‘He has his faults, but your father does seem to love you. He was hurt by what Laura said, he felt angry, but he remained silent, which you cannot do. A king cannot stay silent against injustice, I think many will be very much frowning on his behaviour. And do not feel guilty for that, that was his choice.’

‘I just….I wonder where I belong, do you ever feel like that?’

‘Yes.’ Loki answered immediately. ‘I have the war hero father, and a brother who will be king, who is revered as a great warrior and man’s man and I am a smaller, lithe seidr wielder, they are not what people want or expect of Aesir royal men. I am sick of my brother’s shadow and I want to find my own place, I am not him.’ 

‘We’re both a little lost.’

‘Well, it’s better to be lost with another.’ Loki shrugged. 

Clodagh looked at him analytically. ‘Loki?’ He looked at her. ‘Do you...what do you really think about me?’

Loki’s neck and ears went pink. ‘Well, I kissed you, so you know I like you.’ He stated, his voice tight. ‘I...I like you a lot.’ He admitted before looking into her richly coloured brown eyes. ‘Your spirit, your nature, your joy, you make me actively seek out your company, I want to be around you as much as possible. I love seeing you smile, seeing you talk about animals, and when you interact with them…’ He looked to Mortimer, who was happily dozing on her lap. ‘I realise it, that I love you.’


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clodagh spends time thinking about her future and her past before she is informed of something.

For a few days, people saw little or nothing of Clodagh, she would be spotted from time to time in the gardens, but she seemed to actively seek places away from others. Her father and Lydia waited, as did her siblings and the Aesir royal family. The only ones that really saw her were Huginn and Muninn, and they seemed to understand her need to be away from other people and did not show their master the elf that seemed to love spoiling them with attention and the occasional bit of food. 

Loki watched longingly from afar, he wanted nothing more than to be around her, to help her through processing her whole situation, but he forced himself to remain a step back, to give her the space she needed, as hard as it was for him. 

‘Brother, care to spar?’ Thor asked in good humour one afternoon. 

‘No, not today.’

‘You’ve done nothing since Clodagh has rejected you.’

‘She didn’t reject me, she is taking time to deal with issues that have arisen in her life in that aspect and others.’

‘Meaning?’

‘There has finally been a breakthrough in the wall between herself and Sika, it is causing her to have to question a lot in herself so she is taking a few days to deal with it all, adding to that, she is worried as to what would be expected of her were she to be my wife.’ 

‘Well, we can start small, like not hitting me.’ Thor stated lowly. 

‘Don’t grab small animals from her then.’ Loki warned. 

‘They really like her, don’t they? Father said his ravens spend more time with her than him, they figured out how to unlock the window to get out to her, Mother has to use her seidr to lock them in.’

‘She has that effect.’ 

‘So, how long before she accepts or declines?’

‘Only she can answer that.’ 

Thor clapped his shoulder. ‘I hope you get your answer soon, Brother.’

*

Thor wandered the side garden for no reason in particular, he needed air but the training grounds were being used for drills for the Einherjar, forcing him to seek other areas to fit his requirements. He meandered through it aimlessly, just killing time when he paused and stared open-mouthed at what he was seeing in front of him. 

‘Just look at Muninn, see how he stretches his wings, Muninn, don’t be a sourpuss, show her properly, it’s not like she is going to use flight to steal your perch, you silly boy.’ 

Thor watched as Clodagh help up a tiny bird next to his father’s raven, the raven stretching its wings as she requested. 

‘See, that’s not hard, you do it.’ The bird did as she asked also. ‘Well done. Rabble, you’re a duck, you can fly but you are too lazy to do it, I have seen you, so do not play coy.’ There were a few quacks at that. ‘Mortimer, what will we do with him?’ She laughed before Thor caught her eye. ‘Hi.’

‘You are like something from a storybook.’ Thor commented. 

‘What do you mean?’

‘The way you talk to them, they understand you, it’s odd to see. It is like stories from childhood, more like you are a faerie than an elf.’ 

Clodagh found herself laughing at the thought. ‘I am not a faerie, though that would be fun, I would think.’

‘It would be dangerous,’ She cocked her head slightly as she looked at Thor. ‘Loki is known for his mischief, so too are faeries, a creature born of both….’ He chuckled, but Clodagh bit her lips together. ‘Are you going to decline my brother?’

‘I...I don’t want to.’ 

‘But?’

‘I fear I am not suited to him.’

‘Do you know, before I met you, I resigned my brother to never meet anyone to his liking?’ She looked at him sceptically. ‘No, honestly. I knew he could never have a conventional wife, it would not be in his nature, he needed someone as unique and unconventional as him, seeing you like this, as your true self, it makes me relieved that he will have what he so rightfully deserves, a woman after his own heart.’ She said nothing in return, Thor looked at the small bird that was imitating the ravens. ‘What’s wrong with it?’

‘A hawk killed its mother, I have not seen a male one here, so it doesn’t know how to fly, it needs instruction, so of course, the ravens are the best assistants for that.’

‘Huginn is not being a good aid?’

‘Huginn is off on a message for the Allfather, Muninn here is not obliging as much as he should.’

‘You can tell them apart?’

‘You can’t?’

‘No,’ Thor looked at the raven, who seemed indignant at his response. 

‘They are completely different, different colourings, different personalities.’

‘They are both black ravens.’

‘Huginn has a tint of green and purple to his wings, Muninn here, has blue and pink.’ She explained as though it was as clear as day. 

‘Uh-huh.’ Thor looked at her confused. She just gave a small shrug back. ‘How likely are you to accept Loki?’

‘Why do you ask?’

‘I am worried for my brother, I know you declining will crush him, he clearly loves you.’ she frowned. ‘I am not trying to guilt you, you can only make a choice in this life that is right for you, but I would like to know for my brother’s sake.’

‘You’d want to help him through.’

‘Yes, I would.’ 

‘I want to say yes, I love him more than words…’

‘But?’

‘I am so scared I will ruin everything.’

‘We can stay as we are and risk nothing in life, but then we risk experiencing nothing, if we risk, we risk failure, but we also can risk being happier than we ever thought possible.’

‘Those are some very wise words.’

‘Loki said them to me, when he told me he was going to ask for your hand.’ Clodagh looked at him shocked. ‘He is willing to risk his heart for you. All I ask is you put him out of his misery, one way or another. I know you are dealing with things you are not willing to discuss, but think of this, Loki is a sensitive being, seidr is only able to manifest in a being that is such. For the last five days, he has been wondering if the elf he has given his heart to is going to make him the happiest Aesir alive or crush his heart, think how that is affecting him.’

‘You’re a good brother, even if you can be a bit self-obsessed from time to time.’ 

‘We all have our faults.’ Thor shrugged. ‘Is that the same hedgehog?’

‘Yes, that’s Morti.’ 

‘I thought Loki said you released him.’

‘I did, but he’s not doing too well.’ 

‘What will happen with him?’

‘I may have to look after him permanently. His eye is getting worse and the other eye isn’t looking good.’ 

Thor looked at the prickled creature. ‘Poor guy, he’s actually sort of cute.’

‘Yes, they are, aren’t they?’ She smiled affectionately, looking down at the hedgehog. ‘He loves Loki too.’ 

‘Loki always liked animals, not like you though, I didn’t think anyone could like animals as you do.’ 

‘I am a special case.’ 

‘Indeed.’ Thor gave a smile to show his jesting. ‘I will see you again soon, hopefully I will be preparing to call you Sister, and will enjoy your company as such, your brothers sing your praises so well, I think they are saddened to see you and Amelia depart, but considering the joy you bring both my brother and one of my closest friends, I am glad you are both here, and that you will have one another’s company often with your matches.’ 

Clodagh paused. ‘We would, wouldn’t we?’

‘You had not thought of that?’ She shook her head. ‘Were Loki and I to have had to seek our spouses on a basis as you both did, I would think it would be something I would realise and aim for.’ 

‘I hadn’t thought of it.’ She admitted, but a small smile came to her face as she did. ‘Thank you, you have made a decision a slight bit easier.’ 

‘You are going to say yes?’ Thor smiled.

‘I was scared of being here, facing this alone, but the knowledge that at least, on occasion, I will have my sister as well as Loki, it makes it all the easier.’ 

‘There are no better words you could say, I am elated.’ Thor beamed. 

‘You’re going to gloat you helped this, aren’t you?’

‘It’s not a lie.’ Thor pointed out. 

‘I can see why you and Loki clash horns, you are two troublemakers.’ she scoffed. 

*

Clodagh went in search of Loki, but to her surprise, she could not find him. She was about to see if the Allfather or Allmother knew where their son was when she bumped into Liam, the youngest of her brothers. 

‘Clods, just who I was looking for.’

‘What’s the alibi, and what am I covering for?’ She asked, her arms folded. 

‘As much as I love knowing you always have my back, not today.’ He grinned. ‘Father wants you.’

‘Good or bad?’ She asked worriedly. 

‘Dunno, he said just find you and get you to come to the throne room.’ Liam explained. 

‘The throne room, the Allfather’s one?’

‘Well, he hardly means the one in Alfheim.’ Liam scoffed. 

They went to the room, Clodagh becoming uneasy as she noticed not only her father, Lydia and her siblings there but also Loki and his parents. ‘Have I…?’

‘Norns Clodagh, will you ever cease thinking you have done something to warrant worry.’ Lydia scolded. ‘The only time you have been corrected in your life is for this sort of self-correction.’ 

‘Then….?’ 

‘We need to discuss a matter with you.’ Sika stated plainly. 

‘Is it to do with my decision, because I wanted to talk to Loki about that in private first.’

‘Really?’ Loki looked at her, scared to hope she had decided. 

‘Yes, I was looking for you when Liam found me.’ She explained. 

‘No, it is not to do with that, though I think everyone is glad to hear that much will be dealt with soon.’ Lydia gave an encouraging smile. ‘It is...well, Sika.’

Sika cleared his throat, looking uncertainly at Clodagh. ‘The Allfather and I were speaking. As you are my daughter not by marriage, like your brothers and sister.’ Clodagh swallowed at that, even though it was no secret, it still hurt to hear it said. ‘I want to have you in equal standing, officially. I explained to you already that...well, you know.’ 

‘But it cannot...bastards can’t be made legitimate.’ Clodagh pointed out. Everyone’s faces altered slightly at her use of that word, ranging from sad to angry. 

‘I told you, do not use that word.’ Sika barked. 

‘Indeed, I have told you also.’ Frigga added sternly, ‘Loki?’

‘It goes without saying.’ 

‘Not saying it does not make it any less of a fact.’ She argued. 

‘I will not have that word used in my throne room.’ Odin growled, ending all discussion on that particular discussion. ‘You are King Sika’s daughter by blood, not Queen Lydia’s.’ Clodagh looked sadly to Lydia, showing how she wished it was a false claim. ‘But your father wants it that you can be.’

Clodagh stared at the Allfather then to her father, confused. ‘How?’

‘Legally, Lydia can claim you as her daughter, you are orphaned, technically, because of Genevieve’s passing as she did. When you came to the palace, though we had you tended to, you did not formally get recognised.’ Sika explained.

‘I gathered as much.’

‘And as such your parents were never declared.’ Sika explained further. 

Clodagh frowned, her brow knitted together as she processed what he was saying. ‘So, if you have the Recognition take place and call Lydia my mother….how does that affect everything, Lydia was pregnant with Amelia?’

‘We do not claim me as your biological mother, Genevieve is your mother, no one should ever take that from her, even posthumously. We can, however, state that as you were an infant, so vulnerable and in need of a mother, that I took the role.’ Lydia explained. ‘It means a small fib on our behalf, but it does legitimise you. Apparently a few generations ago, the Queen turned out to be barren so she and her King had a mistress of sorts to carry their young but to legitimise them, there had to be a rule change. Since the queen raised the child and it was of official bloodlines, it could be allowed.’

‘But where is the fib?’ Clodagh frowned, trying to understand what angle everyone else was on. 

‘About Lydia raising you.’ Sika explained. 

‘But she did raise me. Well, her and my maids, but all of us had them.’ Clodagh pointed out. ‘She had my clothes chosen, my lessons, she was there for all of the firsts I can remember, she taught me about puberty, she taught me to deal with all of that, I felt as embarrassed as my siblings when she tried to sing, is that not what a mother is, someone to guide and often times embarrass you?’

There was a stunned silence from the monarchs and grins and nods of concurrence from the younger royals. ‘She has you all there, see, it’s been a formality all along.’ Eoin laughed. 

‘Indeed.’ Odin chuckled. ‘Well, it seems we have that sorted.’ He turned to Clodagh. ‘So long as you are satisfied with it?’

‘I...guess?’ Clodagh felt herself becoming somewhat concerned with it all again. 

‘You are not going hiding for another week,’ Diarmaid commented, ‘Seriously, it’s been long enough. Forget finding yourself, you could have found ice on Nidavellir in that time.’ 

‘Diarmaid.’ Lydia scolded. 

Clodagh smiled at her brother, the most sarcastic of them, he always made her laugh. She noted too that Loki was looking at her, when she looked at him, she could see the silent prayer in his features, he wanted nothing more than for her to say yes, but he seemed ready for no. Part of her thought to ask that they go somewhere quiet and talk, but she thought too of Thor’s words, and how she was forcing Loki to wait on, uncertain as to where he stood and how it was unfair on him. So instead of wasting any further time, and putting Loki out of misery, she walked over to him and stood beside him, putting her hand in his and looking at him sheepishly. For a moment, Loki stared at her before closing his grip slightly and holding her hand, a genuine smile on his face, pulling her against him, gently.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amelia and Hogun get married and Loki and Clodagh get on with life, preparing for their own wedding.

Clodagh stood beside her sister as she declared her love for Hogun to the realm, reciting the words of marital bond as the ribbon was tied around their wrists and they became husband and wife. The usually stoic warrior looking at her lovingly as she spoke, telling Clodagh that he was perfect for her sister, it was clear to see, he worshipped the ground she stood on. It made her all the happier. She looked to those gathered. Thor was officiating the ceremony, something he had been honoured to do, since being named officially as the Crowned Prince on the announcement of his engagement to Princess Kaitlyn. Volstagg and Fandral stood beside Hogun and Clodagh and Regina beside Amelia. 

Regina, to Clodagh’s shock, did not abandon her friendship but decided that she was all the more in need of non-judgemental people around her. Her ability to look past Regina’s often criticised appearance and befriend her, to begin with, was all that the other princess wanted or needed to know apparently. She insisted on helping Clodagh to get used to etiquette and other such things. The pair spoke quietly to one another as Amelia gave them a warning look and the pair erupted in giggles as she did so, trying to look innocent, but failing miserably. 

It was then that her attention came to Loki, who was standing nearby, with her family, Liam beside him, making a comment that it would be them soon enough, Loki grinning more at the thought. 

The day was pleasant, Amelia and Hogun were not overly overt people, so they had a small affair with their families and closest friends. The meal was pleasant, and after came a small party. Loki and Clodagh were never far from each other the entire time. They did dance with others and speak with people, but they were not far from each other. When the bride and groom were being led from the hall for the night, Loki wrapped his hands around his fiance’s waist. 

‘That will be us soon.’

‘If I ever get this princess stuff sorted.’ Clodagh commented back. 

‘I have it on good authority you are doing exceedingly well.’

‘Your source is lying to you.’ Loki chuckled. ‘I am just…’

‘Do not let it overwhelm you, my beautiful Clodagh, wait and see, it will not matter in the end.’

‘Why?’ She asked, turning to look at him in concern. 

‘Because as soon as we say our vows, you and I are heading away.’ She frowned at him. He guided her to a window to the far side of the room and pointed to the distance. ‘Can you see the mountain, shaped like an arrowhead?’

‘Yes.’

‘There is a palace there, in the wilderness, surrounded by only a small village, it is our agricultural land, and you and I are going there for a time, with Rua and Mortimer of course, and we are going to enjoy a life free of the palace, royal roles and duties, and who knows what else.’

‘What are you implying?’

‘I see you with your nephews and nieces…’

‘You want little troublemakers?’

‘Hmm, plural? 

‘Do you?’

‘With you, yes. I want a small army of terrorising little half-elven children knees grazed as they run through the bushes chasing some poor animal they want to “save”.’

‘And using their seidr to turn a younger sibling into a rabbit to play “animal rescue” with.’

Loki laughed, ‘Norns, yes. That sounds like utter bliss to me, what about you?’

She smiled and bit her lips together. ‘Is four too many for you?’

‘Light Elves like big families.’ She nodded. ‘I will bow to what you request on that matter, though I do not think we should set a number until you have endured a pregnancy. It may alter your feelings on the subject.’

‘As long as they are legitimate.’

‘If they were not, I would not deny them, I would not treat them differently, I would love them and declare to the worlds that I am their father and I love their mother, and dare them to say anything against them.’ Loki declared. ‘Besides, it is hardly a deterrent when the most incredible woman I have ever met is…well’ He gave her a loving smile. 

Since the open declaration of the old law that allowed for Clodagh to be deemed legitimate, she and Loki seemed to speak more about the fact she was not born so, as a way to work through Clodagh’s self-esteem issues. It was working, very slowly. She seemed to accept herself a little more every day. 

‘No.’

Loki put her hair behind her ear. ‘In all fairness, there is little risk of it happening, we have behaved ourselves.’ 

‘Thus far.’

‘True.’ Loki conceded.

*

Clodagh hardly noticed Loki enter the room. ‘Hello, my dear.’ She did not turn to look at him. ‘Clodagh?’

She turned slightly, not looking at him, instead keeping her gaze of Mortimer, who was falling asleep after a meal of grubs. ‘Hi.’

‘Hey, is everything okay? Is it something to do with the wedding?’ Loki asked worriedly. 

As they readied themselves for the wedding, Loki was concerned by the severe lack of cold feet he was certain Clodagh would get. 

‘My sister has decided to ruin everything.’

Loki frowned. He knew she was after meeting her sister for the first time in six months, Amelia and Hogun having spent a month in Asgard after their wedding before going to Vanaheim for half a year. ‘Is she not coming?’

‘No, she is coming, she is, after all, my chief bridesmaid.’

‘Then what is the issue?’

‘The dresses I had the dressmaker make.’

‘Yes?’

‘Guess who got pregnant on her wedding night? How terribly inconsiderate of her.’ Clodagh beamed. ‘My sister is having a baby.’ 

Loki thought for a moment that Clodagh was legitimately upset with Amelia regarding her pregnancy, but seeing her bounce slightly in excitement made him realise she had been joking. ‘Another niece or nephew to favour you over the others.’ 

‘Didn’t you hear, Uncle Loki is the best uncle, he does magic.’ She smiled. 

‘Forget our little army, we have a legion of nieces and nephews.’ Loki grinned, putting his arms around her. ‘So you do not mind your sister taking some of your thunder?’

‘Not at all, I am just so happy that she is happy. They are so excited, I hope….if it comes to us…that we are as happy.’

‘We will be, wait and see.’


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time passes, and with time, comes the requirement to return to the city, how does Clodagh fair with that?

Loki and Clodagh could hardly recall most of their wedding day, it was a blur. So much had to be done and so many faces were there that they could not remember between them who they did and did not speak with. She stood with her husband for the majority of the day, needing his support, feeling as though she was somewhat out of place, but Loki reminded her, again and again, she was as deserving of her place and that he loved her dearly. 

Her brothers were jesting with Loki any chance they could get, while also threatening to bury him if he hurt their little sister. Loki knew that Hogun got the same threats, so he accepted them, feeling as though he was being accepted into the family through them. 

Clodagh and Amelia were more often talking about the baby than the wedding. ‘I get to see her first, hopefully.’

‘It will take you longer to get back here than mother and father from Alfheim, she won’t get to see her aunt as much as I thought she would.’

‘I know,’ Clodagh hugged her as close as her belly would allow. ‘We’ll see each other though, and you can bring her to visit me when she is a little older.’ 

‘I can’t believe you and Loki are literally just going hiding in the wild.’

Clodagh laughed, ‘That’s not what we are doing and you know it. You know yourself from Hogun, both Loki and myself are not suited to here, he is not happy either.’

‘I know, he found you and you validated his own feelings that being royal means having to be a certain way.’ Amelia stated sadly. ‘I’ll miss you.’

‘Yeah, I’ll miss you too.’ She pulled her sister close. ‘Thank you, Meils. None of this would have happened if you did not shove me, kicking and screaming here.’ 

‘You came so far, it’s weird to watch in some ways, you’re still my sister, just so much happier, more at ease with you.’ 

‘Girls?’ The pair turned to see Lydia behind them. ‘Are you alright?’

‘Just talking about how you are officially free of us all now Mother, now Clods is married.’ Amelia smiled. 

‘A mother’s job is never done, even if my last baby has grown up and left me.’

‘Amelia’s younger, she’s your baby.’ Clodagh smiled. 

‘Eoin is as much my baby as you two are.’

‘Haha, Eoin’s a baby.’ Amelia joked. 

‘You are as much of a child as the one in you.’ Lydia scolded, causing both girls to laugh. ‘And speaking of childbearing and related acts, you need to go with your husband now.’ Lydia looked to Clodagh, who smiled back at her. ‘You are so deserving of this happiness.’ 

Clodagh pulled Lydia to her. ‘Thank you for everything. I know Genevieve birthed me, but you, you will always be Mother to me.’ 

Lydia pulled her closer and tried to stop herself from weeping. Since Sika had declared Clodagh of his line, Lydia had openly done in public what she did all Clodagh’s life in private, acted as though she was her daughter. The irony of it all was everyone realised that there was no change in the woman’s treatment of Sika’s lovechild, she was treated as she was before. Clodagh, however, began to give her the title of Mother, something that filled the Elven queen with pride. Sika, on the other hand, slowly, and on more than one occasion, awkwardly, started to be inserted into her life. He spent time with her, learning her as to just about her, as well as spending time with Loki, getting to know his soon to be son-in-law. He realised quickly that even Loki’s words on his daughter did not do her justice. He adored all his children, but he realised Clodagh’s purity was something indescribable, she truly was as precious as the river she was named after. 

When she walked back to Loki, Clodagh knew that the room was filled with people, all looking at them, all making lewd comments and whistles, but all she could see was Loki, who was looking at her with the same look. After sticking to their morals, which were tested, they had remained without tearing the clothes off one another until their wedding, now all bets were off, the young newlyweds were anxiously awaiting for their lives together to begin. When she reached him, he smiled. ‘Ready?’

‘As you are.’ 

‘Come on so.’ He smiled, taking her hand in his. 

*

The smaller palace in the country suited the pair perfectly. Loki’s seidr thrived and Clodagh felt as though she belonged. Mortimer’s blindness impeded him so greatly he became a permanent figure in the household, the royal couple even having a little bed in their rooms for him, though in the front part, Loki insisted a squeaking hedgehog was not conducive to a healthy marriage in the bedroom, an area of their marriage that they were learning more about often. Rua seemed to treat the palace as a place to go on occasion for an easy meal or cosy, the land surrounding it was filled with vixens, and come Spring, Loki and Clodagh were convinced there would be little Rua’s infesting the realm en mass.

Not long into their time in the forests, they received word from the city, Mya Hogundoddir had graced the realm with her presence. They went back to the city for her naming, and as promised, Clodagh was the first of Amelia’s family to meet the infant, but they left soon after again but returning as soon as Thor’s wedding came around, the pair blatantly happy to be back amongst friends for a time, but their smiles showed their own contentment with their lives. 

*

After a century, Odin decided that he was stepping down from the role of Allfather, he wanted to see out his old age without the stresses of ruling. His Odinsleeps were occurring more often, the Healers believing it was largely due to the stresses of ruling the realm. That required Loki returning to court to assist Thor. he was scared to tell Clodagh, who was content and happy with her life in the country, surrounded by animals. 

He walked out to the gardens of the palace and looked at his wife, watching as she bottle fed a deer fawn. He felt guilty, he was about to ask her to leave a place that she was clearly happy in and go back to the prying world of court. With everything considered, he wondered if he could go for a time and return to her when it all settled, but the idea of being away from her for that length of time seemed torturous. 

‘Is it doing better?’ He asked as he approached. 

‘This is her last bottle. She is old enough to get on without it now.’ Clodagh smiled on seeing her husband. She watched as he remained slightly back. ‘What is worrying you?’

‘Thor is taking the throne.’ Loki informed her. ‘We are being asked to return.’ 

Clodagh looked down at her hands. ‘Oh.’ 

‘If you rather stay here, I understand.’ He did not want to give her that option in some respects, he did not want her to be on another part of the realm. 

‘I can hardly stay here, so far from you, with all of this, can I?’ She sighed. ‘We knew this would not be forever, that we would have to return to the city sooner or later.’

‘But you don’t want to?’

Clodagh inhaled deeply. ‘The day I took your hand in your father’s throne room, I accepted our future, the day I swore my vows to you that I would be by your side, that I knew what that entailed. I accepted a marriage proposal from the Prince of Asgard, that means accepting the life that comes with it.’ 

‘Do you hate me?’

‘I never could.’ Clodagh smiled lovingly. ‘Help me up, we may as well pack.’ Loki assisted her to her feet. ‘This is going to be fun.’

‘Why do I suspect that this is going to be half the reason you are unwilling to return?’ Loki chuckled. 

‘Half? My dear husband, you have no idea.’

‘It will not be that bad.’

‘You will pack yourself and think that you are don, I will have to pack for me and deal with everything else in the palace that is required to come with us.’

Loki said nothing more, not wanting to concede she was more than likely right. ‘Huginn and Muninn won’t remember you.’

‘Yes, they will, don’t say such things.’ Clodagh scoffed, recalling the way the two ravens reacted when she returned to the palace on their last visit, they seemed to think she was at risk of disappearing from their sight and were almost ignoring Odin for her.

‘I hardly got any time alone with you because of them, and what they see, my father sees.’ 

‘I hope not because there was one night that Huginn did see us when you and I…’

‘Oh Norns, why are you telling me this?’

‘I meant to say it to you at the time, but I got sidetracked.’

Loki grinned. ‘Of course you did.’ 

‘Let us prepare for this.’ 

*

Loki looked at Clodagh as she dozed against him in the carriage, she was lulled to sleep by the gentle rocking as it moved. He worried about her as she readied everything for their journey. When they said goodbye to the palace that had been their home, she shed a sad tear, but she held his hand and smiled as they turned and walked into the carriage. 

The realm was all a din with the upcoming coronation, royals, dignitaries and ambassadors from all the realms were there. They carriage was delayed in the streets as they made their way to the palace. Clodagh woke as they came into the city, so she was looking out the window as they did. They saw the people were looking at them as they passed, but one girl caught their eye, she waved with more enthusiasm than any other. 

‘Stop the carriage.’ Clodagh demanded. As soon as she said it, the coachman obeyed. Loki watched in shock as she opened the door before the coachman could descend the steps to do it and walked over to the girl, who beamed happily. ‘Hello Mia, you are getting big.’ 

‘Hello princess.’ The girl curtseyed and smiled back. 

‘No toy?’

‘I am too big for that now.’

‘I bet you are.’ She could not stop smiling. ‘Is my name still different?’

‘Yes, you’re named after a river.’

Clodagh laughed. ‘I am, I am named after a river, it’s true.’

‘That’s weird.’

‘I know.’ Clodagh acknowledged. ‘Do you know, my sister has a daughter and she named her Mya, I know you are Mia, but she actually thought of you when she named her.’

‘Really?’

‘Yes, she is Hogun’s the Grim’s wife, so if you ever know that girl, you can think that.’

Mia paused for a moment before beaming proudly. ‘I am glad you’re our princess, but if you are a princess, and Mya’s mum is a princess, is Mya one too?’

‘In her own right, yes.’ 

Mia turned to a boy close to her, similar in appearance and age. ‘I have a princess named after me, you have a puppy, I win.’ She stuck out her tongue and walked off, causing Clodagh to laugh and make her way back to the carriage before she felt eyes on her. She turned slightly and smiled a different smile as she realised there was a carriage stuck behind theirs, the occupier of which glaring at her. She said nothing as she entered her carriage and looked to her husband. 

‘Do you know that girl?’

‘We’re old friends.’ 

‘I see. Why the sneer?’

‘Another friend is behind us.’

‘Dare I ask?’ Clodagh gave him a smirk. ‘Really?’

‘She has to be here, she is the princess of Vanaheim.’ 

‘It helps to get pregnant with your brother’s child.’

‘It sounds like it is a family trait.’ 

That was the last they said as the carriage made its way to the palace. When it arrived, they smiled and watched as they were brought passed the main entrance and around the side to a smaller one. When it came to a halt, they were elated to see Loki’s family there waiting for them. The carriage door opened and before Loki and Clodagh could move, two others rushed out. ‘Grandma.’ 

‘Look at the size of my babies, hello.’ She knelt down and embraced her two grandchildren. ‘I have missed you so much.’

‘We missed you too grandma, but Mommy and Daddy said we are staying here now, is that true?’ The boy asked. 

‘Yes, you are living here with us now for a time, won’t that be exciting?’

‘You’ll be sick of us.’ Loki grinned as he exited the carriage before extending his hand to his wife. 

‘I could never….you kept that quiet.’ Frigga watched as Clodagh exited the carriage, one hand in Loki’s, the other cradling a quite obvious baby bump. ‘Three children, in a hundred years, really? Are you planning on having an army?’

‘It’s a good thing it is a big palace.’ Loki grinned as he looked to Clodagh, who was giving him her “Don’t be too bold” smile. 

‘Your brother is talking about a second, by the time he comes to a decision, how many more will you two have?’ Odin commented, looking at his grandson as he came over to him to tell him about his attempts at horse riding. 

‘At least one more by then, not including this one, Kaitlyn does not like childbearing too much.’ 

‘The same cannot be said with you it would seem.’ They turned to see Thor coming for them, his own son rushing out alongside him to his cousin, who was only a year older than him. ‘Brother, it is good of you to want to keep the line going, I am not sure what you heard, but Asgard and indeed Alfheim are not having a population crisis, your attempts to assist is not required.’

‘You are jealous,’ Loki grinned. 

Thor gave him a small glare before they all walked into the palace happily, and readied for the coronation.


	13. Chapter 13

‘Mother, please don’t give her that, she’ll never settle.’ Clodagh pleaded as Lydia gave Taragh another bit of frosting from her cake, the now-retired queen never was a fan of overly sweet foods.

‘Nana is the best.’ Taragh beamed at her mother.

‘What about Grandma?’ Lydia asked.

* * *

 

‘I am too spoiled.’ Taragh admitted almost downtrodden, causing them to laugh. ‘Cause I have Grandpa and Granddad too.’

‘And Mommy and Daddy.’ Sika stated with Mya on his lap, who had been telling him about her beginning school as was the norm at her age on Asgard. ‘And you are lucky, not spoiled.’

‘It shouldn’t be lucky to have a nice family.’ Taragh argued.

‘No, but that is how it is.’ Her father shrugged.

‘LOKI!’

‘Oh Norns, what does he want?’ Loki rolled his eyes at his brother’s bellow. When Thor stormed into the room gingerly holding a hedgehog in his hands, he glared at his brother. ‘Yes, Thor?’

‘Get it reversed.’ He ordered, putting the hedgehog on the table.

‘Get what reversed?’ Loki asked, looking at the animal. ‘Why have you brought a random animal into the palace?’

‘It is not some random animal, it is Modi.’

‘Thor, your son is a blonde yay-high boy, not a hedgehog.’ Loki’s hand was to where Modi was approximately in height.

‘Conor turned Modi into a hedgehog.’

Loki looked at the door where his son was looking at them, unable to take a grin off his face, as hard as he tried. ‘Conor, come here.’ The boy entered the room. ‘Is that Modi?’ he indicated to the hedgehog, who was grooming itself in the table.

‘Nope.’ He shook his head, his black hair going wildly side to side as he did.

‘Why do you seem so pleased with yourself?’ Loki asked suspiciously. ‘Darling?’

Clodagh moved forward to the animal, who ceased grooming it’s leg and looked up at her. ‘It’s not Modi.’

‘It is.’ Thor argued.

‘Thor, this is not your son.’ Clodagh stated factually.

‘I saw him turn Modi into this thing.’ Thor stated firmly.

Clodagh looked at Loki. ‘How easy is it to change a gender?’

‘What?’

‘Is it easy to change a creature’s gender?’ She repeated.

‘Norn’s I thought it a stretch to suggest Conor changed his species at this age but gender, no, it is not possible.’ Frigga answered.

‘Then this is not Modi unless he has female organs.’ She pointed to the hedgehog’s genitalia, ‘it’s a female.’

Thor frowned and looked at the creature for a moment before turning to look at a beaming Conor. ‘Then where is my son?’

‘Conor, where is Modi?’ Clodagh asked her son.

Loki waved his hand and a green flash of his seidr emitted it’s glow, taking a moment to sense everything, Loki paused and stared at his son. ‘Oh, you clever little boy.’ He grinned.

‘Loki?’ Thor looked at his brother worried.

‘Conor did use seidr on Modi, yes, there is no denying that.’ Loki conceded.

‘So he lied?’ Thor looked at his nephew angrily.

‘No, you asked me if I turned him into a hedgehog and I didn’t, so that’s not a lie.’ Conor pointed out.

‘Do not get into semantics, you used seidr on your cousin.’ Thor growled.

‘No, we will get into the semantics of it. If you asked specifically if Conor did that and he answered he didn’t, he didn’t lie.’ Loki countered. ‘Conor, remove your spell.’ Conor did as requested and Modi appeared, grinning next to his father. ‘He put an invisibility spell on him, nothing more.’

‘And going by the grins they both have, it was a plan to have you see them.’ Frigga eyed her grandsons.

‘You were played; by two children,’ Loki erupted in laughter. Thor glared at him angrily, but could not say anything. The added laughter of the other adults caused him to remain silent.

‘You cheeky pair of troublemakers.’ Sika chuckled. Conor rushed over to his grandfather, sitting on his lap next to Mya.

‘Boys will be boys.’ Odin added.

‘Boys will be...when we were kids you were on us about everything, you threatened to have me sent to Jotunheim once.’ Thor stated in shock.

‘You were pulling a young girl's hair and being mean to her, that is different, the boys here played a harmless joke, no one was harmed, though that animal looks somewhat confused by the situation.’ Odin looked at the hedgehog who was after turning right side up again and was nibbling food that Clodagh was feeding it. Taragh went to her mother and helped feed it.

‘You haven’t seen your ravens today, have you dear?’ Frigga smiled.

‘I assume they are awaiting Clodagh to return to her rooms later.’ Odin stated dismissively.

‘I have not seen them in a day.’ Clodagh informed him.

The retired Aesir ruler frowned at her. ‘Where are my birds?’

‘Huginn and Muninn are in our room,’ Conor declared proudly. ‘They made nests there and everything, but they are made of blankets, not real nests.’

‘Why are the ravens there?’ Thor asked.

‘I don’t know, we left the window open but they don’t see to want to go anywhere. Mommy said to leave them to do what they want, you can’t force them. They like to get scratches and they play with our hair.’

‘Well, I cannot say I am surprised.’ Sika chuckled, looking proudly at his daughter, who gave him a smile back.

In the time since his admission to her, he was eternally grateful for her giving him a chance to show her how grateful he was. The birth of two grandchildren had made him elated, but when she insisted on him being an active part of their lives, he openly wept, declaring he felt unworthy of such an honour, since he had not been there for her, but she insisted. With another on the way, he felt all the more overjoyed.

*

‘How are you feeling?’ Clodagh turned to look at her husband.

‘Like I just pushed a half-elven, half Aesir baby out of my body.’ She smiled, holding their newest daughter in her arms.

‘Well, girls are ahead now, poor Conor and Aidan.’ Loki looked at his daughter, small and fragile, sleeping in her mother’s arms.

‘So what, an even six?’ She smiled knowingly.

‘Well, five is a terribly awkward number. It’s good to outnumber Thor’s lot three to one.’

‘Kaitlyn is carrying.’

‘Well, we definitely have to have another, two to one is a minimum requirement, right Aoife?’ He rubbed their daughter’s hand.

‘You really do want your army.’ Clodagh joked.

‘Loki’s army, it has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?’

‘With nieces and nephews too.’

‘All are welcome, Darling.’ He winked.

**Author's Note:**

> Clodagh is pronounced Clo-Da.   
> Rua is pronounced Rue-Ah and is the Irish for red.


End file.
